United thread 2017/18

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the gegenretreat?
Each United player will be under orders to lie down and sunbathe for at least 30 seconds in turn. Walk slowly for throw ins, to put the ball down and let the full back walk slowly for the throw in. DDG to slowly take the kick out from the opposite side of the box. Intended sub will be ordered to the opposite side of the pitch for sunbathing before walking slowly to the touchline, clapping fans and shaking hands with the ref, before long slow hug with replacement and manager.
Just pray that Chelsea take the lead
 
Each United player will be under orders to lie down and sunbathe for at least 30 seconds in turn. Walk slowly for throw ins, to put the ball down and let the full back walk slowly for the throw in. DDG to slowly take the kick out from the opposite side of the box. Intended sub will be ordered to the opposite side of the pitch for sunbathing before walking slowly to the touchline, clapping fans and shaking hands with the ref, before long slow hug with replacement and manager.
Just pray that Chelsea take the lead
This will be another match where slow motion replays won't be needed.
 
This is comedy gold.

http://www.skysports.com/football/news/11661/11355051/cruyff-pep-was-close-to-utd-job

In an exclusive interview with Sky Sports, Cruyff says Pep and United had been "aligned", but the Old Trafford club eventually opted for David Moyes instead.

Yeah I can see that - I mean when the GPC retired if you were on the rag board and you compare Pep's record at Barcelona and Moye's at Everton there is one standout manager for the job clearly
 
This is comedy gold.

http://www.skysports.com/football/news/11661/11355051/cruyff-pep-was-close-to-utd-job

In an exclusive interview with Sky Sports, Cruyff says Pep and United had been "aligned", but the Old Trafford club eventually opted for David Moyes instead.
This reminds me of the time I had ‘aligned’ a threesome with Michelle Keegan and Nicole Scherzinger, there was ‘a chance that I had a chance’ ( whatever that means) and everything looked promising, then I decided to take a ‘different road’ and went for a spot of self-abuse instead.
No regrets though!
 
This is comedy gold.

http://www.skysports.com/football/news/11661/11355051/cruyff-pep-was-close-to-utd-job

In an exclusive interview with Sky Sports, Cruyff says Pep and United had been "aligned", but the Old Trafford club eventually opted for David Moyes instead.

In other words, Interviewer asked Cruyff if Pep could have managed rags, Cruyff says some bollocks about how they could have got together.

In actual fact, Pep was always destined to be City manager once Soriano and Bergistrain were on board but press need to let rag fans think they had a chance.

Transparent as fuck.
 
This is comedy gold.

http://www.skysports.com/football/news/11661/11355051/cruyff-pep-was-close-to-utd-job

In an exclusive interview with Sky Sports, Cruyff says Pep and United had been "aligned", but the Old Trafford club eventually opted for David Moyes instead.


It'd almost be funnier if it was true. With their "luck" and Guardiola's ability they possibly could have won everything by now. Obviously Ferguson didn't fancy his legacy being outdone seeing as he was the main proponent for hiring Moyes.
 
In other words, Interviewer asked Cruyff if Pep could have managed rags, Cruyff says some bollocks about how they could have got together.

In actual fact, Pep was always destined to be City manager once Soriano and Bergistrain were on board but press need to let rag fans think they had a chance.

Transparent as fuck.

This. All day long.
 
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