United Thread - 2023/24

[johnnytapia]

It was all looking so good.....

 

[deano ou812]

This is like asking "do bears shit in the woods".
Of course he'll be on his platform boring to death subscription paying supporters of other football clubs with his woes.
It's predictably boring from Sly sports that every week of every season they are trying to spoonfeed their audience on all things Man utd.
Pathetic man working for a Pathetic company

It is a disgrace especially when there is 19 other teams in the league but they let him have a platform to push the narrative of Glazers are bad for the rags,surprisingly they don’t seem to have cottoned on that subscribers are cancelling sky over not just the price but the continuing fawning of anything no matter how small of the rags ..

 

[BringBackSwales]

Funny to think that the only points they’ve got have been from incredibly fortunate wins against notts forest and wolves

 

[Colin Bells Boots]

That's a fair assessment. He is also judged on his one or two games a season when everything clicks for him and he actually looks decent. But in reality he is averaging 9 league goals a season.

just like so many of them, massively over-hyped and paid in excess of £300,000 per week for being .........ordinary

 

[Colin Bells Boots]

Funny to think that the only points they’ve got have been from incredibly fortunate wins against notts forest and wolves

Those weren't fortunate from PiGMOL's point of view ........
allegedly.

 

[Roachy]

I bet you (rightly) thought we'd never win the league back in the day.
Hang on in there, good things come to those who wait.

It would be truly delicious.

 

[horlock_was_super]

Tide may be turning against Ten Hag in terms of support from match-going fans, if noise at the substitutions yesterday was anything to go by. When he goes - probably this season, unless results pick up - those ‘fans’ will say that Ten Hag failed because the job was too big for him. They’d be right. You could bring in Ferrán, Pep and Txiki and tear up the FFP rule-book while you’re at it, and it still wouldn’t work, because they need a Total Reset at levels a CEO, a director of football and a head coach can’t reach. They need to start acting like what they are - a top-half-of-the-table Big City club - like Aston Villa, say - but with a squad of overpaid and untalented misfits, who were hired by a succession of managers, who are on contracts too long to manage and wages too high to walk away from, with a decaying old-school stadium that generates no income from other sources and which can’t be improved, who when they lose a game - as all teams in their position do - should be graceful in defeat and admit they were beaten by the better team in order to dial down the media heat, rather than feel the constant need to keep that heat at boiling point by going on about a home defeat to Brighton as if the national flood defences had failed or there’d been a run on the banks, and who should publicly acknowledge that they’re just another club, that what they won 30 years ago has no bearing on next week’s game, and that the weight of expectation (“this is Manchester United we’re talking about”) is crushing everything they’re trying to do.

Ten Hag is not a bad coach - he’s up there with Luis Enrique, Klopp, Nagelsmann & Tuchel in the best-of-the-rest bunch. But he’s not working miracles, so he’ll have to go. Rinse, and repeat.

As John Lydon sang all those years ago: “and it’s all falling to bits…gloriously!”

He also said ‘this is no fun….’
Oh it fucking is!

 

[The perfect fumble]

The dickhead Stuart Hall used to refer to the swamp as the Theatre of Dreams in his post-match reports on Radio 5, but I'm not sure if that's the original reference.

Stretford Strangeways

 

[Vienna_70]

Gladstone Small.

I used to call him "neckless".

 

[the blue panther]

I was going to bring this up... I only started noticing that silly theatre name being used probably mid-late 90's, which I assume to be all part of the commercialised hyperbole that came with the advent of the PL, can any oldies confirm if the silly theatre name had been in use much longer than that, ie back in the 60's or 70's, or is it just a modern invention created by the rag loving media?

I only recall hearing Stuart Hall referring to it as the Theatre of Dreams, then others within United like the pisscan - after he got some success - started calling it the same, as did sycophantic pundits - while Maine Road was the Theatre of Base Comedy.
It's been the Theatre of Nightmares for them for a decade, pretty much.
The Etihad is Dreamland.

 

[CC1]

What is amusing is how ignorant about football some of their fanbase has become. I saw their highlights last night. At one point Rashford miscontrolled the ball, ran like a headless chicken with his head down, and sliced the ball wide of goal. It was pathetic yet all the fans in the Stretford End applauded wildly as if it was a near miss. Rashford is repeatedly described as world-class, especially for his England performances against pub teams. But he is an average player. He has pace but no awareness of the rest of the field. He is 26 next month but is not as good now as he was aged 18.

The other thing that stood out for me - but wasn’t mentioned at all by his “admirers” - was the way he just slowly jogged about when he lost the ball & in particular when the rags didn’t have the ball. No hard work from him - he just likes the glory.

Our players, on the other hand, run around & press the opposition like mad when we haven’t got the ball - & win it back. Every one of them.

But that’s why we’re treble winning; record breaking CHAMPIONS.

CITEH

 

[fulabeer]

Sancho has mental health issues. Ffs every one has issues. I'm fucking sick of sportsmen on radio going on about mental health. No fucker cares about Joe bloggs. I have enough on my plate to worry about any fycker on the radio who cries wolf ( when it seems they fuck up) to then issue a " I suffer from " just fuck off.

I'm not saying Sancho has mental health issues. What i mean Tent Peg distancing himself from any come back if there is any kickback in the future. Ie i didn't bully/mistreat Sancho. I was just following my bosses orders etc.
It shows he isn't up to the job.

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

10 shots faced with 7 goals. Fucking hell this new keeper is shit! You absolutely love to see it

Not sure that stat is true, sadly. Brighton had 8 shots on target yesterday and scored 3.

 

[Gazza]

Does he ever smile?
He's one surly looking guy

Models himself on Martial.

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

Looks to me like their players don’t believe in what they are doing.
Rashford very selfish, shots at the near post when a team mate was free in the middle.

He obviously believes in that. He’s done it his whole career.

 

[Sky Blue Thinking]

Funny to think that the only points they’ve got have been from incredibly fortunate wins against notts forest and wolves

Some would argue assistance from officials rather than mere luck. Without decisions contraversially going their way they could be hovering above relegation places.

 

[Colin Bells Boots]

I'm not saying Sancho has mental health issues. What i mean Tent Peg distancing himself from any come back if there is any kickback in the future. Ie i didn't bully/mistreat Sancho. I was just following my bosses orders etc.
It shows he isn't up to the job.

He's keeping his talent well hidden ......................

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

Runs fast, kicks ball hard. That's it

He has balance issues inside the penalty area too. Prone to falling over.

 

[domalino]

They've had a relatively difficult start to the season, but six points from 15 is a pitiful return (especially when you consider how fortunate they were against Wolves and, to a lesser extent, Forest). They appear to have made little progress under Ten Hag, and few of his signings have really worked out. Real had their pants down getting £70m for Casemiro. I imagine that results will improve as the fixtures get easier (Burnley, Palace, Brentford and Sheffield Utd in the league before they play us), but it's only papering over the cracks. Their problems are so deep-rooted that there is no quick fix. It's glorious to see them in this state.

I remember last year when everyone in the British football punditry was really high on Casemiro, Sid Lowe just said “Real Madrid very rarely sell at the wrong time”.

And I looks like he was absolutely spot on. He was good for 6 months after arriving and has looked closer to 41 than 31 ever since.

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

Something the glazers always do is sack the manager if top 4 is looking unlikely.... and I'm getting England under Capello vibes with them. The players don't seem to want to work hard for him and they've undermined the manager before. He could be gone soon.

Not sure they can afford to. They couldn’t afford Amrabat.