Whats the worst thing the missus has felt out with you for?

charliebigspuds said:
bluereddish said:
Every time theres extramarital shenanigans in Coronation Street or Emmerdale or any other fcukin' tv programme she turns to me and says "You'd never do anything like that, would you?" "Of course not" I always reply. You can then tell that the events of the stupid fictional televised crap are playing on her mind more and more until you are just waiting for her to pipe up again with "Are you sure you'd never do anything like that? You would tell me, wouldn't you, blah, blah blah" It does my head in and we end up having an almighty row which leads to other more serious real-life things being brought up.
Click to expand...
she's a nutter!
Click to expand...

Yeah I can relate to this. I've done this.
 
TFC said:
Stupidest thing?

I bought some zucchini's when she had 'told' me not to. I didnt listen apparently, I dont listen, etc, etc, etc for about 2 fooking hours.

(stopped listening after the first 10 mins or so... ;-)
Click to expand...


Do men really do this?? How rude !! lol ;-p

P.S. This thread is hilarious...:-)
 
After 25 years of being married I can honestly say, things dont change. Same shit different day. Now she's right I dont listen, and I dont give a shit. I wish you the best of luck guys. I sure of shit wouldnt go through it all again.
 
MCFC-alan88 said:
Joycee Banercheck said:
An ex fell out with me for a few days when I pissed all over the front seats and dashboard of her car. I'd held it in for too long after a few pints so I tried pissing in a bottle, but there was only a little bottle of sprite in the footwell. I filled that up too quick and it did that thing where you put ypur finger against a running tap and it goes everywhere, including all over her. I laughed, she didn't.
Click to expand...

That's funny as, yet quite disturbing, I think she had grounds to be "pissed" :)
Click to expand...
Hehe. We were on our way to her parents for a BBQ for her dad's 50th at the time. I sat there with all her family wearing her shorts all day. I don't think she ever really forgave me.
 
sleeping with another girl in the same bed. to be fair, it actually ended the engagement.

for the record, i didnt touch her.
 
when my wife woke up after lying in an awkward position,she said"my arms gone dead"
i replied"wank me off,it will feel like somebody else". the punches felt like mike tyson to be fair to her!
 
chedinho said:
when my wife woke up after lying in an awkward position,she said"my arms gone dead"
i replied"wank me off,it will feel like somebody else". the punches felt like mike tyson to be fair to her!
Click to expand...


Haha!
 
hairyblue said:
I tried to donkey punch her but i knocked her out and when she woke up she kicked me out the house and reported me to the police for assault.

Bet you can't beat that!
Click to expand...

I was about to ask what a "donkey punch" was ... but then looked it up. You are one sick puppy!

Wikipedia English - The Free Encyclopedia

Donkey punch is a slang term for a potentially lethal sexual practice sometimes performed during anal sex. The purported practice involves the penetrating partner punching the receiving partner in the back of the head or neck.
 
if any of you are having trouble in the sack with the missus ye can try the bucking bronco..

mount her and half way through proceedings call out her sisters or best friends name and see how long you can stay on for.. great sport
 
sdavros said:
if any of you are having trouble in the sack with the missus ye can try the bucking bronco..

mount her and half way through proceedings call out her sisters or best friends name and see how long you can stay on for.. great sport
Click to expand...
PMSL
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Unread Posts

Don't have an account? Register now and see fewer ads!

SIGN UP
Back
Top
✖
  AdBlock Detected
Bluemoon relies on advertising to pay our hosting fees. Please support the site by disabling your ad blocking software to help keep the forum sustainable. Thanks.