When was the last time you soiled yourself?

Many years ago I had to take a dump, we were in some woods and it was the middle of the night, so I took a shovel and dug a small hole in the ground - it was winter so the ground was pretty solid. I stripped off, I was wearing overalls so I kept the bottom trouser part on (pushed down around my ankles) and just struggled out of the top jacket bit. Anyway I did my business but because I hadn't 'been' for a couple of days there was a lot, so the hole in the ground kind of got full quickly! - I had to shuffle forwards a bit and as a result my overall jacket went underneath me - all un-beknown by me. So eventually I finished and started to get myself dressed, I found a rather large warm present in the shoulder of my jacket that I put my arm in, needless to say it spread all the way down the inside of the sleeve and also fell down my back :( - Took me 2 hours to clean myself up in the dark and get changed into clean kit !! - Happy days!
 
I tooted once and shat me self whilst wearing cream chinos - i was very embarrassed so i just said 'how's that for Bobby Sands'
 
Many years ago I had to take a dump, we were in some woods and it was the middle of the night, so I took a shovel and dug a small hole in the ground - it was winter so the ground was pretty solid. I stripped off, I was wearing overalls so I kept the bottom trouser part on (pushed down around my ankles) and just struggled out of the top jacket bit. Anyway I did my business but because I hadn't 'been' for a couple of days there was a lot, so the hole in the ground kind of got full quickly! - I had to shuffle forwards a bit and as a result my overall jacket went underneath me - all un-beknown by me. So eventually I finished and started to get myself dressed, I found a rather large warm present in the shoulder of my jacket that I put my arm in, needless to say it spread all the way down the inside of the sleeve and also fell down my back :( - Took me 2 hours to clean myself up in the dark and get changed into clean kit !! - Happy days!
Woods, middle of night, shovel….. what on earth!!?!?
 
I find if your ever travelling past your house in the day your arsehole knows and embraces the fact you can enjoy a turd on your own throne and this day was no exception. As I got to my front door I was sweating but still confident there was just enough time to get on the shithouse. As I pulled my van keys out I realised the house keys were in my locker and now I’m panicking big time. My neighbours a nosy old fool and I’m worried he’s watching me wondering what I’m doing home at this time. I had overalls on also and my arse clock wasn’t calibrated for all this delay, I’ve got seconds to make a grim decision. Starts to get my arms out in a frenzy and rips the sleeve straight off but there’s no time and I’ve wrote off my boxers. Took the overalls off and cleaned up best I could with the sleeve and carried on my day thinking it could have been a lot worse.
 

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