Joke thread

[oakiecokie]

I saw that. I just thought it was a mirror with a crack in it

It was ... but this fucker had hair around it.

 

[Lavinda Past]

Don’t get it.

;-)

It's the way he tells 'em

;-)

 

[BackofJeanette]

 

[dronefromsector7G]

I was in Tesco earlier, and I said to the checkout lady, "This has got today's date on it love. Can I get something knocked off?"
She said, "Do you want the fucking newspaper or not?"

 

[Indaparkside]

What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom
One snatches your watch
The other watches your snatch

 

[Sid C]

What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom
One snatches your watch
The other watches your snatch

I think Tesco owe you some money.

 

[bonespost]

 

[Big Swifty]

What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom
One snatches your watch
The other watches your snatch

I think we could have worked the last line out for ourselves.....

 

[Indaparkside]

I think we could have worked the last line out for ourselves.....

Not on bluemoon thick cunts:)

 

[dickie davies]

Not on bluemoon thick cunts:)

Try this one then

What's the difference between a goldfish and a goat?

One mucks around a fountain

 

[dickie davies]

Meanwhile the premier league invited all clubs to run in its charity marathon event, but only two clubs sent a participant, Manchester City and Liverpool and the City runner won the event

The Liverpool Echo reported that LFC''s entrant finished a very commendable second place, whilst the Manchester City runner was next to last

 

[Tuearts right boot]

I think we could have worked the last line out for ourselves.....

Steady on....this is Bluemoon remember.

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

Try this one then

What's the difference between a goldfish and a goat?

One mucks around a fountain

What‘s the difference between oral and anal sex?

One makes your day…

 

[dronefromsector7G]

 

[andy h]

After six kids, Mary feels a little loose "down there" and decides to treat herself to some cosmetic surgery to tidy up. When she comes to from the anaesthetic after the procedure, she finds two bouquets of flowers in her room. The nurse tells her that the first is "from your loving husband, who's looking forward to you coming home." Mary asks about the second bouquet. "That's from Gerald in the burns unit," the nurse says. "He's thrilled with his new ears."

 

[Tuearts right boot]

After six kids, Mary feels a little loose "down there" and decides to treat herself to some cosmetic surgery to tidy up. When she comes to from the anaesthetic after the procedure, she finds two bouquets of flowers in her room. The nurse tells her that the first is "from your loving husband, who's looking forward to you coming home." Mary asks about the second bouquet. "That's from Gerald in the burns unit," the nurse says. "He's thrilled with his new ears."

Yes...the old ones are still the best.

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[bonespost]