Chilli Sauce (and other gourmet sauces).

A 'mate' once put Dave's on my eyelids after I passed out at a house party..... I woke up suddenly with the most excruciating pain as I frantically tried to remove my contact lenses! Trip to A&E followed and after numerous washouts, I could see again!
Some mate that, next time he falls asleep slap him and put a bottle of Caroline reaper up his pooper!
 
Just looked in our sauce cupboard for some Worcestershire sauce and found that Mrs D has most of the chilli sauces mentioned on this thread but most of them are at least three years out of date, as is the fucking Worcestershire sauce. You can tell we don’t use most of the sauces much
 

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