Those of you who have seen my posts recently know about my mum...
But i want to say quickly I got to the parade, got my son out of school early and made sure mum ok and left her in good hands, and I took my son to his first parade. He was very excited, got what I thought would be great spot, quite near the start, front row, he planned to stand on his step stool (age 6) and wave his homemade trophy at the players. That was 4.20pm!
Then when it was too late to move 3 idiots thinking just of themselves stood next to us, stood on the barriers... He couldn't see now..
Skip forward to the rain.. His excitement lessened but still ok, but then when it got so dark and the strong thunder he was crying badly and saying when can we go home. My heart was broken. Other kids nearby were crying too by that point. I feel like such a failure of a mum.
Then the bus finally started, through his tears he waved his homemade foil trophy, those selfish selfish men next to us who could see quite well standing normally were not only stood on the barrier but leaning so far forward he saw nothing until the bus was right in front. And then in pot luck not a single player looked down and only good old Ruben was in view. I know that bits a gamble, but it's the selfish twats next to us that get me...
Then he cried and set off towards the car with his dad, and I failed again in the mum of the year comp by legging it after the bus.
I got to see it again in a bottleneck near booth street, absolutely drowned , and crushed, lots of families gave up and pushed back to get out. Then as the bus came 4 adults in front put 4 more adults in their shoulders much to the groans of everyone around. But, had a cracking view of erling and ruben topless saving trophies around, so I was happy. Really felt the moment.
Then as walking away ended up trapped in a crowd that suddenly got pushed sideways by the police, a ton of people being shoved into those of us already stood, and it was because the bus turned and was coming despite no street barriers. Crushed and leaning diagonal, but don't get me wrong I had a cracking view and lost myself into the feel of it and soaked thru to the skin chanted and pointed and just felt it. Happy. One of those moments where you forget your shit and are just caught in the moment.
It will be the last time I feel that pure joy for a long while.
As today my mum is worse, and is very likely to not make it to weekend. My world is gone.