Dealing With a Break-up

[Timmmmahhhh]

I got the boot at the beginning of December, I'm still bitter and twisted about it.

Hope that makes you feel better? ha

Just go out, enjoy yourself, then go home, listen to the Adele album, drink vodka and wank/cry yourself to sleep.

I have done all of the above. Some of her mates also post on here, so I could be in for an interesting weekend.

And slags do help you get over these things, smash some back doors in, it gets easier.

EDIT -

Yes, time does make things easier.

Don't take your phone out, she doesn't want drunken texts about you feeling sorry for yourself.

Infact, I'd say not taking your phone out when drunk is the most important starting point, drunk texts/Facebook/phone calls ruin lives & relationships.

 

[ifiwasarichfan]

Cliche's are there for a reason. Answering your question, time is indeed, a great healer.

Hundreds of us on here will be testament to that, - chin up Kid.

 

[Mad Eyed Screamer]

I was married for 7 years and wanted to leave after about 3/4. Stayed for the kids. In the end I just had to leave rather than face a lifetime of misery!

I wanted to leave and yet felt shit when it happened. (mainly guilt for the kids).
As long as I was there for them that's all that mattered.

The first few days were awful, didn't eat anything for 2 days. Just stayed in listening to The Smiths and Morrissey albums to cheer me up.....

 

[Ducado]

As of today after 3 years, i am single. At the moment it hasn't properly sunk in, but i'm feeling more and more depressed as the day goes on. I'm off out to my local tonight with my mates just so i can get out of the house for a few hours. But what i was wondering, it's all well and good going out tonight to forget about it, but how do you forget about it tomorrow, the day after, the day after that and so on? I don't want the macho comments like 'go town, n shag the first girl you see' cos i'm not like that and will never have a one night stand, and anyway how often does that actually happen. Is it true that time is a great healer? Do i just allow myself to get depressed and mope about for a few week in the hope i forget over time? I've deleted her number and everything that i had to do with her has gone, as i felt that might be a good start. Sorry for the thread but just dunno what i'm going to do and how i'm going to cope. I know i'm not the first person in the world to have a relationship end, but at this moment in time it feels like i am.

Forget about it? You can't do that not after 3 years you can't

A mental hurt is much like a physical hurt, if you break your leg your going to have some pain, you would expect that, but you know as time goes by the pain will ease off and then eventually cease all together.

So there is nothing else to do, but be there with the pain, you can't hide from it, you can try and mask it but it will come through again, the best thing for you to know it's all part of being human, and know that you will heal eventually

 

[mcfc1894]

Some great, helpful advice here cheers. She also said she wants to stay friends but i said i can't, cos if we stay friends i'll always want it to be more again and that's not going to happen. Plus i don't see the point in staying friends, it's not as if we knocked about in the same group of friends and will always bump into each other. Again thanks, gonna take alot of it on board

 

[MC Sam FC]

Yeah it is a cliche but time is the greatest healer.

I split with my missus of 3 and a half years and I was in bits for over a month.

I think you've got to mourn it kind of thing then, when you feel ready, move on.

We split in June and I'm feeling a million times better now, hanging about with old friends and had some great times that I wouldn't have had otherwise.

I won't lie though, it's hard, very hard. There are still days that go by where I think about her but not so much as when we first split.

You WILL heal over time and things WILL get better, I've never felt as bad and depressed as when my ex finished me but in your own time you'll get over it.

Good luck mate, all the best.

 

[Dirty Harry]

Some great, helpful advice here cheers. She also said she wants to stay friends but i said i can't, cos if we stay friends i'll always want it to be more again and that's not going to happen. Plus i don't see the point in staying friends, it's not as if we knocked about in the same group of friends and will always bump into each other. Again thanks, gonna take alot of it on board

Most def mate, but break off ALL contact from now on bud, if she asks, tell her nothing and don't give her the knowledge or satisfaction of the highlighted bit.

 

[Timmmmahhhh]

Some great, helpful advice here cheers. She also said she wants to stay friends but i said i can't, cos if we stay friends i'll always want it to be more again and that's not going to happen. Plus i don't see the point in staying friends, it's not as if we knocked about in the same group of friends and will always bump into each other. Again thanks, gonna take alot of it on board

Most def mate, but break off ALL contact from now on bud, if she asks, tell her nothing and don't give her the knowledge or satisfaction of the highlighted bit.

I'm mates with both of my last two ex's, the first we are like best friends (were together 4 1/2 years), the other (only together for 8 or 9 months) still at the weird stage cos it's only been a couple of months since.

Sorry for contradicting what's already been said, but I don't see why ex's can't be friends, it works for me.

 

[MC Sam FC]

Some great, helpful advice here cheers. She also said she wants to stay friends but i said i can't, cos if we stay friends i'll always want it to be more again and that's not going to happen. Plus i don't see the point in staying friends, it's not as if we knocked about in the same group of friends and will always bump into each other. Again thanks, gonna take alot of it on board

Most def mate, but break off ALL contact from now on bud, if she asks, tell her nothing and don't give her the knowledge or satisfaction of the highlighted bit.

I'm mates with both of my last two ex's, I see recent, the first we are like best friends (were together 4 1/2 years), the other (only together for 8 or 9 months) still at the weird stage cos it's only been a couple of months since.

Sorry for contradicting what's already been said, but I don't see why ex's can't be friends, it works for me.

I've just recently become best friends with my ex from ~5/6 years ago. It's not weird at all anymore and we just clicked when we saw eachother again.

But the one I split with in June I couldn't even imagine being in the same building as her yet, let alone speaking with her...

 

[MCFC BOB]

I'm not going to speak for everyone, but when my girlfriend called time our relationship after being together for just over 2.5 years in July last year I thought my life was over. On top of that, she decided to get with someone else just four days later to kick me when I was down. But if anything, the hatred of her that I soon developed helped me move on a bit more.

All I can say is that over the next few months you'll realise just how valuable friendship can be. I've spent literally every other night going to my friend's houses, playing video games, having fun, playing football, going to pub quizzes every Monday. I joined a band and we've got a gig next month at Manchester Academy, I'm playing football quite well again because my hair doesn't block my vision and basically... I'm free to do what a young lad should be doing. I still hurt from time to time and there are days where I think, "God I miss her" and I do still talk to her a bit, but as I understand it, that's natural.

Sure, having a guaranteed shag every now and then is great, but commitment and being in love doesn't feel like all that once you've been carefree and only be responsible for yourself. I realised a little too late that being in a long-term relationship at my age (15-20) is too much hassle. Hell, even the teachers at my college noticed a huge change in my attitude and disposition when I came back after the summer holidays.

So yeah, being single isn't all that bad.