Dealing With a Break-up

I broke up with my missus of 4 1/2 years around 2 years ago now, and at times it still hurts. Normally I'm fine, but those times when you are home alone and want to watch a movie, or go do something but not by yourself still really suck and your mind can't help but wander to the past.

The best thing I have realised from it though, is that you don't miss her, but you miss the feeling of being with her. Just the security blanket type feeling of having someone there.

As people said, hang out with your mates and find a hobby to keep your mind occupied and you'll come through it.
 
at least you wil be able to come on BM more often.203 posts in 4 years is a shocking return.I bet berti has made more appearances on here.come join the fold brother.you will get sound advice on breakups alcholism gambling and we even have some clever chaps giving technical advice for your pc problems.i was even cured of my addiction to one legged dwarf porn by a fellow bluemooner.how he manged to carry that box full of cds down to the tip i'll never know.thanks bob you were a star and he didnt even want paying.ps if you need advice on pc troubles make sure its plugged in first.you dont want to look a pillock.
 
mcfc1894 said:
As of today after 3 years, i am single. At the moment it hasn't properly sunk in, but i'm feeling more and more depressed as the day goes on. I'm off out to my local tonight with my mates just so i can get out of the house for a few hours. But what i was wondering, it's all well and good going out tonight to forget about it, but how do you forget about it tomorrow, the day after, the day after that and so on? I don't want the macho comments like 'go town, n shag the first girl you see' cos i'm not like that and will never have a one night stand, and anyway how often does that actually happen. Is it true that time is a great healer? Do i just allow myself to get depressed and mope about for a few week in the hope i forget over time? I've deleted her number and everything that i had to do with her has gone, as i felt that might be a good start. Sorry for the thread but just dunno what i'm going to do and how i'm going to cope. I know i'm not the first person in the world to have a relationship end, but at this moment in time it feels like i am.

Join a gym, play footie, get out and about. You need to get busy mate, i felt the same when i broke up with my mrs of 2 years a few years back but you really do get over it, honestly! Don't let your house become a prison for your thoughts, theres a whole world out there and it's far to big to just sit around thinking of a girl.

You've already made massive steps in deleting the number and all that, letting go is the hardest part. After a month or two when you've had a few good nights out and got something else going on in your life it'll all just fade away.

I see my times with my ex, yeah some were shite but some were good but it just wasn't meant to be. You have to think that for all the shite times you'll have even better times with the next person.

Gotta stay positive and think now you have the free time you can do some things you wouldn't previously, like i said i took all mine out on the gym and went from being overweight to quite fit and got playing footie again, never regretted anything.

A good place to start is going into town early next wednesday, get smashed, sing your heart out and watch the blues batter Porto.
 
Never underestimate the healing power of getting pissed and shagging a pig. I know it may seem shallow and desperate, but you can't beat that feeling of emptying your sack and it effectively removes any right you have to feel all hurt and sorry for yourself. Keep repeating this process until you find one you like, ditch the ones you don't by trying weird stuff in bed to freak them out and giving them your phone no. with the last digit changed. Enjoy.
 
Ive been through a divorce and not seeing kids for months, etc and it is a really difficult thing to get over. The way I coped was to keep busy with work, hobbies, anything to keep from dwelling on things. Dont want to give you false hope of getting back with your lass, but I'm re-marrying the woman I divorced, so nothing's impossible. (We were too young when we married the first time)
 
Never forget that you are in charge of your emotions.

If you wallow in your sadness, then that's your choice.

If you accept that life is a series of ups and downs and accept that and move on... that too is your choice.

What you do next is totally up to you. You have that power. And having that knowledge should help you recover and see things different to how they are at the moment.

Don't live in the past. Make you mind up as to what you want to do in the future. And get on with it!
 
Feel for you brother. 'Mutual decision' to end a 5 year relationship about 2 years ago.
I systematically shut down my feelings and became what was lovingly described as 'an emotional robot'.
Shagged anything that moved... Getting over a woman isn't all bad!

Got to a point where I was sat watching 'Scrubs' with 3 prostitutes at 4am on a Thursday and thought... I need to get a grip.

Now going out with a great girl, but I wouldn't change anything about the past 2 years.

Rule number 1 - Don't shit where you live
Rule number 2 - Always wrap up
Rule number 3 - Never turn down a Lads holiday
Rule number 4 - Cut ALL ties with your ex
 

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