Dementia

TinFoilHat said:
I've been estranged from my old man for 12 years. Religion took him away from me. Only found out 6 months ago he's been suffering with dementia for 3 years.

Tried contacting his wife, who said I only need to ring her to arrange to see him. I tried and the phone number I have for him. It has now been cut off.

I don't know if he's passed away or the line has been cut deliberately because I could be an agent of the devil in her eyes.

His mum/my gran suffered the same way. As another poster had the same experience of the crying and screaming when left alone. She called me my dad's name and my dad was his dead brother, who passed away in car accident in the late 60's.

My old man claimed there was a family curse that no male gets passed 63.

If he's still alive he's 75. I hate to feel how he does in his mind. Maybe the 'family curse' is a blessing to save heartache later on.

:(
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Sorry to hear that mate
 
I've social services coming to see my sister (aged 60) as her dementia getting worse. She had memory test last July and no results yet. Told there wouldn't be until she has follow up appointment which could take up to 10 months. I'm constantly contacting her GP and a family friend in benefits office. Sister now off sick and submitting sick line. She thinks it's every week (surgery told me it's every 3 months). Changed to benefits to £75 (roughly) a fortnight. She gets in right state when no money in bank on Thursday she isn't paid even though we've put it in her calendar and diary paid or no pay depending on the week. She say's she's received phone call today from citizens advice saying they need her drs notes. Trying to explain I doubt citizens advice would be asking for them unless she was asking them for help
 
On the back of this last season it shows the effect short vlogs can have to drive a message home



Fucks sake then I found this

awful

 
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Thankfully my parents went fairly young without having to suffer this horrible illness. My FIL has Parkinson’s and is now showing signs of early stage dementia. My mate’s mum has been in a care home for 8 years and is still going. She hasn’t recognised him for at least 7.5 of those. He still visits every week. My heart breaks for him when he mentions it. Lost all her assets too bar the minimum allowed. Terrible.
 
Millwallawayveteran1988 said:
Thankfully my parents went fairly young without having to suffer this horrible illness. My FIL has Parkinson’s and is now showing signs of early stage dementia. My mate’s mum has been in a care home for 8 years and is still going. She hasn’t recognised him for at least 7.5 of those. He still visits every week. My heart breaks for him when he mentions it. Lost all her assets too bar the minimum allowed. Terrible.
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My partner's aunt died just before Christmas. Had Parkinson's and dementia. Last few years couldn't even communicate other than a grunt
 
ob said:
My partner's aunt died just before Christmas. Had Parkinson's and dementia. Last few years couldn't even communicate other than a grunt
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Just dreadful isn’t it. Nobody warns you about this getting older lark! Thankfully we convinced the in laws to move closer last year which was a huge move as they had lived in their previous house and town for 40 years. We can help them a bit now and my daughter goes after school for a quick chat and snack so they love that as they were becoming very isolated. My FIL hasn’t got too long left I don’t think. Maybe 2/3 years. He looks frail and old now. At least 5 years older than he is. My wife’s stress levels have gone through the roof with it. I’ve been there with my mum who I was running around for during and after Covid and it takes its toll when you work full time. I was exhausted when she died so whilst it was sad that she went early (74) in some ways it was for the best as her health was really going downhill and she was in and out of hospital. It was a horrendous last year for her with falls, problems with illness and loneliness. She did her meet my gorgeous granddaughter though and saw her for two months before she went. That lifted her last weeks.
 
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My nanna is 94 and in a secure unit now as she gets nasty and violent. Shes unrecognisable of the woman she was 5 years ago. A total shadow of her former self.
She has a vague recognition that im something to do with her but doesnt really know why or who.

When ‘the phone call’ comes there will be a sense of relief and peace with me. I want her suffering over now. She isnt ‘nanna’ anymore.
 
Bluesince1979 said:
My nanna is 94 and in a secure unit now as she gets nasty and violent. Shes unrecognisable of the woman she was 5 years ago. A total shadow of her former self.
She has a vague recognition that im something to do with her but doesnt really know why or who.

When ‘the phone call’ comes there will be a sense of relief and peace with me. I want her suffering over now. She isnt ‘nanna’ anymore.
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My Nan is 88 and is exactly the same. When I walked in and you can see her trying to work out who I am is awful.

Luckily my dad lives next door. He is fully retired now so looks after her 24/7. Age concern have been excellent. They have got carers coming in a few times a week. Got her one of those electric beds and riser/recliner chairs.

Hope I never get it and cause all the grief, stress and upset to my immediate family.
 
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BlueMonkey79 said:
My Nan is 88 and is exactly the same. When I walked in and you can see her trying to work out who I am is awful.

Luckily my dad lives next door. He is fully retired now so looks after her 24/7. Age concern have been excellent. They have got carers coming in a few times a week. Got her one of those electric beds and riser/recliner chairs.

Hope I never get it and cause all the grief, stress and upset to my immediate family.
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Its a fuckin terrible disease.

I did a job in a dementia unit maybe 5 years ago. Poor bastards only in their 50s riddled with it. Awful
 
Bluesince1979 said:
When ‘the phone call’ comes there will be a sense of relief and peace with me. I want her suffering over now. She isnt ‘nanna’ anymore.
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I think it’s good you can admit that mate. My family fell out with me a bit when one of them overheard me telling a nurse that I wished my mother would just slip peacefully away in the night before their plans to try and bring her home to see out her days came to fruition.

But they admitted later that it was probably for the best.

Who knows what’s going on in their heads in the latter stages but it clearly isn’t any quality of life.
 
Stephen230 said:
I think it’s good you can admit that mate. My family fell out with me a bit when one of them overheard me telling a nurse that I wished my mother would just slip peacefully away in the night before their plans to try and bring her home to see out her days came to fruition.

But they admitted later that it was probably for the best.

Who knows what’s going on in their heads in the latter stages but it clearly isn’t any quality of life.
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We are all thankfully in agreement , its no life, she is in mental torture.
Shes strong enough really but in very rare moments of clarity she talks of going home. But home to her is back to wythenshawe to her mum and dads. Its awful.

If i showed her a photo 5 years ago when she was still well of what she would become , she would hate it.

Terrible, terrible disease
 
I took my Mum to Salford Royal today for a Neurologist appointment. We need to go back in a few weeks for the results, I am scared shitless that she may have dementia.
 
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It’s such a terrible illness. My uncle had it and became very violent in his care home. He was a lovely man before the illness took hold. One of my mates mums has been in a care home for 8 years now. Burned through all her life savings and he still goes to visit week in week out despite her not having a clue who he is. It’s so sad. I’m glad in a way that my parents went before this.
 
My brother was knocked off his bike last February and suffered a massive brain injury. He's only 56 and is now really struggling with the first signs of Dementia. It's so sad and scary to watch a 6ft man looking scared because he can't remember what he's done during the day. He can't manage coming to City anymore but on his last jaunt to A&E he was asked by the Doctor several questions including who is the prime minister. He had absolutely NO idea but when asked about his football team he said it loud and proud MANCHESTER CITY of course.
 
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