Funniest thing you have heard at a match

at a Uefa Cup game, we were losing to some rank unknown side, it was cold and everyone was sat down, very quiet when Osbourne (who to most of you that probably don't know, is absolutely dire and struggled to complete a pass, or even connect with the ball on occasions) gave the ball away ...30 mins in, some guy behind just stood up in pretty much silence at the time, said "I've fucking had enough, Osbourne you're the worst fucking player I've ever seen in a Villa shirt, you're meant to playing as an anchor, yet your just a fucking wanker, fuck off, i'm going home"....then just walked out the ground while everyone stared. That was my favourite moment especially as it was a shit game.

also a funny one at the time, there was the guy at the bottom of the top tier looking up ...everyone was stood up singing "we shall not, we shall not be moved...we're pride of birmingham etc..." and he was just stood there, waving his flag singing the song but a good 5-7 seconds later than everyone else and he struggled with the words singing "we're the best in birmingham" he was pissed and swaying about. was funny at the time just watching him in his own little world. kept standing up throughout the game, turning round to face everyone and started singing songs that he'd just made up. one was like "Jimmmyyy millnerrr on the wing, du du du du du du du, on the wing, super jimmy, millllnnnnnneeeeer" it weren't even a song to be honest, just him shouting words.

Oh and "Carlos Tevez, got bit by a shark, bit by a shark, bit by a shark ...carlos tevez, bit by a shark!".....and of course any song about Joey Barton, "bartons brother takes it up the arse, up the arse..." etc..
 
Villan10 said:
at a Uefa Cup game, we were losing to some rank unknown side, it was cold and everyone was sat down, very quiet when Osbourne (who to most of you that probably don't know, is absolutely dire and struggled to complete a pass, or even connect with the ball on occasions) gave the ball away ...30 mins in, some guy behind just stood up in pretty much silence at the time, said "I've fucking had enough, Osbourne you're the worst fucking player I've ever seen in a Villa shirt, you're meant to playing as an anchor, yet your just a fucking wanker, fuck off, i'm going home"....then just walked out the ground while everyone stared. That was my favourite moment especially as it was a shit game.

also a funny one at the time, there was the guy at the bottom of the top tier looking up ...everyone was stood up singing "we shall not, we shall not be moved...we're pride of birmingham etc..." and he was just stood there, waving his flag singing the song but a good 5-7 seconds later than everyone else and he struggled with the words singing "we're the best in birmingham" he was pissed and swaying about. was funny at the time just watching him in his own little world. kept standing up throughout the game, turning round to face everyone and started singing songs that he'd just made up. one was like "Jimmmyyy millnerrr on the wing, du du du du du du du, on the wing, super jimmy, millllnnnnnneeeeer" it weren't even a song to be honest, just him shouting words.

Oh and "Carlos Tevez, got bit by a shark, bit by a shark, bit by a shark ...carlos tevez, bit by a shark!".....and of course any song about Joey Barton, "bartons brother takes it up the arse, up the arse..." etc..

Think you may have miss-read the title

Funniest thing you have heard at a match

:)
 
Not at the match but in the chippy tonight. Im not sure about Mancini he's to negative..................WE HAVE JUST WON 4 FUCKIN NIL
 
warpig said:
right at the start of a game, literally 1 second after the ball had been kicked off, this fella behind me stood up and shouted at the top of his voice "come on city, this is fucking shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhite". still makes me chuckle now.

sweynforkbeard said:
Many many years ago when I used to watch Altrincham a lot I took my girlfriend, who had never been to a football match, to an away game at Northwich Vics.It was a Boxing Day local derby and very cold-she turned up in the Alty end her Mum's green and white scarf (Northwich colours) and then after 89 minutes with the score at 0-0 when Northwich were awarded a penalty with vicious swearing, despair, hanging of heads all around us, said in a very loud voice-"Never mind-it might be an indirect penalty." 26 years later I'm still married to her.


This
 
Peteri said:
warpig said:
right at the start of a game, literally 1 second after the ball had been kicked off, this fella behind me stood up and shouted at the top of his voice "come on city, this is fucking shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhite". still makes me chuckle now.

sweynforkbeard said:
Many many years ago when I used to watch Altrincham a lot I took my girlfriend, who had never been to a football match, to an away game at Northwich Vics.It was a Boxing Day local derby and very cold-she turned up in the Alty end her Mum's green and white scarf (Northwich colours) and then after 89 minutes with the score at 0-0 when Northwich were awarded a penalty with vicious swearing, despair, hanging of heads all around us, said in a very loud voice-"Never mind-it might be an indirect penalty." 26 years later I'm still married to her.


This
Brilliant.
 
My 64 yr old dad against Everton.

At the top of his voice after he had tried to cut Silva (i think) in half.

"Neville...Neville, get your fuckin DNA checked, you and yer brother are both bastards.

He makes me so proud :)
 
This is a joint message from UEFA and tonights referee;
Please refrain from throwing objects on the pitch as this is a safety hazard and UEFA may fine your Manchester City football club if this behavior continues

Yesterday v VFC
 
WINNER HERE
This absolute fuckwit that sits near me,a grown man said "for fuck sake who employs these ball boys" (because he thought they were too slow)
 

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