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Funniest/wittiest replies to a question
- Thread starter ColinBellsjockstrap
- Start date
ColinBellsjockstrap
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- Joined
- 23 Dec 2009
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- 8,480
Zubrman
Well-Known Member
I used to work in the Non Food warehouse of a large cash & carry. One day the Food side was having a stock-take and had requested some help from our side.
My manager told me to go round and let myself be known to the Food side's manager. I went over, found him and said I'd been sent to help out.
"Where's the rest of yer?" he asked.
"Underneath me overalls!" I said.
My manager told me to go round and let myself be known to the Food side's manager. I went over, found him and said I'd been sent to help out.
"Where's the rest of yer?" he asked.
"Underneath me overalls!" I said.
Protein Junkie
Well-Known Member
Man in Nightclub “ can I have a dance with you?”
Woman “ my husband is over there”
Man “I don’t want to dance with him”
Woman “ my husband is over there”
Man “I don’t want to dance with him”
Uncle Wally One Ball
Well-Known Member
Yes that is indeed witty....Norwegian reporter live on TV : Have you a message for all your fans in Norway, Paul ?
Paul Gascoigne: Yeah, fuck off Norway.
supercity88
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- 9 Aug 2009
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- 13,872
I remember being a kid and some family from Canada were over visiting. One of them said to me "so which side of the road do you drive on over here" to which I replied "both".
It would have been witty if I wasn't an idiot.
It would have been witty if I wasn't an idiot.
bluechippie
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- Joined
- 17 Jul 2009
- Messages
- 216
Soldiers on parade, Sergeant Major stops and prods one of the lads with his stick."There's a **** on the end of this stick" barks the sergeant,the private replies "It's not this end sir"
Fiftyyearsandcounting
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- Joined
- 25 Oct 2009
- Messages
- 2,098
A clearly nervous passenger, about to board her plane, asked me if these planes crash often. I replied "Only once madam". Perhaps not the most helpful or reassuring reply.
denislawsbackheel
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- 28 May 2008
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- 26,084
- Team supported
- We went to Rotherham…
Was at a Library theatre ( remember that?) matinee years ago.
It was full of coach loads of oldies.
At the interval one old dear was walking out then as she got to the curtain slowly slid to the floor.
I ran over to help her and couldn’t resist asking her
“Who do you think you are, Tommy Cooper”?
It was full of coach loads of oldies.
At the interval one old dear was walking out then as she got to the curtain slowly slid to the floor.
I ran over to help her and couldn’t resist asking her
“Who do you think you are, Tommy Cooper”?
discopop
Well-Known Member
One of the best comebacks on the cricket pitch.
Australia plucked out Zimbabwe’s ninth wicket at 120 and in walked Eddo Brandes. The game was all but won by Australia but Eddo wasn’t going down wondering and he decided to play his shots. A few minutes later, Glenn McGrath, the Australian pacer, casually asked Eddo, ”Why are you so fat?”
Eddo Brandes, the Zimbabwean bowler, didn’t miss the opportunity and quickly replied, “Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit.” Even Glenn McGrath was stunned by that snorter of a reply by Eddo. Interestingly, McGrath wasn’t married at the time. He married his first wife Jane in 1999.
Australia plucked out Zimbabwe’s ninth wicket at 120 and in walked Eddo Brandes. The game was all but won by Australia but Eddo wasn’t going down wondering and he decided to play his shots. A few minutes later, Glenn McGrath, the Australian pacer, casually asked Eddo, ”Why are you so fat?”
Eddo Brandes, the Zimbabwean bowler, didn’t miss the opportunity and quickly replied, “Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit.” Even Glenn McGrath was stunned by that snorter of a reply by Eddo. Interestingly, McGrath wasn’t married at the time. He married his first wife Jane in 1999.