Gary Speed has died

[gio's side step]

I've no time for people who commit suicide.

I do believe in free speech though.

I agree, he may have "found peace" but his wife and kids never will.

Selfish act, no matter what the reason.

If you've never experienced the level of depression that leads to suicide then you have no clue what you are talking about.

I do know what I am talking about. I know what that moment feels like when you know (beyond a shadow of a doubt, because everything in your brain and your heart is telling you it is true) that you are so stupid and so worthless and so much trouble and such a shitty undeserving person that everyone would be better if you were gone.

And you can't get away from that feeling, it's everywhere, it surrounds you and colors every interaction you have, every relationship you have until doing anything but killing yourself seems incredibly, awfully selfish. Like staying alive just proves what an awful, horrific person you are. Like still being on earth is causing everyone you love so much trouble and hurt, and the only way to stop hurting them is to kill yourself.

I've been in that moment, and I was saved from it by an incredible person and an incredible team of doctors who did not call me selfish but instead treated the very real illness I was suffering from, just like they would have treated me if I had been dying of cancer.

I don't know if Gary Speed got to that moment, but if he did I can only mourn the fact that he died in so much pain and without being able to understand how loved he was.

This a beautifully heartfelt raw honest post. Really appreciate you sharing it.

 

[MCFC BOB]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMV4dl-x0Tc[/youtube]

 

[Cheesy]

I've no time for people who commit suicide.

I do believe in free speech though.

I agree, he may have "found peace" but his wife and kids never will.

Selfish act, no matter what the reason.

If someone is driven to killing themselves due to suffering from depression the act of committing suicide is the most unselfish thing they can do. They absolutely know the world (including their family) will be better off without them. I'm not having a dig here, but if you think suicide because of mental illness is selfish then it just shows that you don't know an awful lot about the subject.

 

[intheknow!]

<a class="postlink" href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/article-2067858/Lets-ideas-end-Gary-Speeds-life-Martin-Samuel.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/articl ... amuel.html</a>

Another absolutely fantastic article by Samuel. I too feel uncomfortable about the way Speed is being portrayed as a hero.

O/T he has a great piece about Mourinho further down the article too.

 

[JoeMercer'sWay]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/article-2067858/Lets-ideas-end-Gary-Speeds-life-Martin-Samuel.html

Another absolutely fantastic article by Samuel. I too feel uncomfortable about the way Speed is being portrayed as a hero.

O/T he has a great piece about Mourinho further down the article too.

who's making him a hero because he committed suicide?

there's a difference, and I think that article, albeit well intentioned, grabs the wrong end of the stick.

 

[malg]

I've no time for people who commit suicide.

I do believe in free speech though.

I agree, he may have "found peace" but his wife and kids never will.

Selfish act, no matter what the reason.

If someone is driven to killing themselves due to suffering from depression the act of committing suicide is the most unselfish thing they can do. They absolutely know the world (including their family) will be better off without them. I'm not having a dig here, but if you think suicide because of mental illness is selfish then it just shows that you don't know an awful lot about the subject.

I have never quite understood the viewpoint that suicide is the cowards way out and an act of selfishness. Couldn't even begin to imagine what someone is going through to take their own life.<br /><br />-- Wed Nov 30, 2011 8:25 am --<br /><br />

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/article-2067858/Lets-ideas-end-Gary-Speeds-life-Martin-Samuel.html

Another absolutely fantastic article by Samuel. I too feel uncomfortable about the way Speed is being portrayed as a hero.

O/T he has a great piece about Mourinho further down the article too.

who's making him a hero because he committed suicide?

there's a difference, and I think that article, albeit well intentioned, grabs the wrong end of the stick.

You read a different article to me then. Some very good points made, a cracking read.

 

[cibaman]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/article-2067858/Lets-ideas-end-Gary-Speeds-life-Martin-Samuel.html

Another absolutely fantastic article by Samuel. I too feel uncomfortable about the way Speed is being portrayed as a hero.

O/T he has a great piece about Mourinho further down the article too.

who's making him a hero because he committed suicide?

there's a difference, and I think that article, albeit well intentioned, grabs the wrong end of the stick.

The point he's making is that well meaning actions eg giving a postumhous award to Gary Speed, is likey to have the effect of increasing the number of suicides. That giving publicity to suicides has been known to encourage copycat suicides as in Bridgend

 

[BoyBlue_1985]

I agree, he may have "found peace" but his wife and kids never will.

Selfish act, no matter what the reason.

If someone is driven to killing themselves due to suffering from depression the act of committing suicide is the most unselfish thing they can do. They absolutely know the world (including their family) will be better off without them. I'm not having a dig here, but if you think suicide because of mental illness is selfish then it just shows that you don't know an awful lot about the subject.

I have never quite understood the viewpoint that suicide is the cowards way out and an act of selfishness. Couldn't even begin to imagine what someone is going through to take their own life.

-- Wed Nov 30, 2011 8:25 am --

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/article-2067858/Lets-ideas-end-Gary-Speeds-life-Martin-Samuel.html

Another absolutely fantastic article by Samuel. I too feel uncomfortable about the way Speed is being portrayed as a hero.

O/T he has a great piece about Mourinho further down the article too.

who's making him a hero because he committed suicide?

there's a difference, and I think that article, albeit well intentioned, grabs the wrong end of the stick.

You read a different article to me then. Some very good points made, a cracking read.

Your spot on with that. Absolutely brilliant read

 

[Cityfan]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/article-2067858/Lets-ideas-end-Gary-Speeds-life-Martin-Samuel.html

Another absolutely fantastic article by Samuel. I too feel uncomfortable about the way Speed is being portrayed as a hero.

O/T he has a great piece about Mourinho further down the article too.

I am not sure that he is saying that the portrayal of Speed is incorrect, he is generally protrayed as a good guy rather than a hero. He is talking about the portrayal of suicide generally and the copycat affect this can have. Very well written article all the same I agree, retains compassion but is very insightful about the portrayal of suicide.

 

[Fame Monster]

I'm not sure why you're obsessed with decency Lucky Toma. It's merely a defence mechanism in the real world insofar as it removes you from the potentially violent consequences of saying what you feel. But on a forum, and no such consequences exist, people will say what they feel, and I think that's a good thing so long as it's a topic that can be debated.

There's no compulsion to pay respect to Gary Speed on a thread like this. A lot of people didn't know him and would hate their wife or husband to go out the way he seems to have done. That will obviously move a lot of people to debate his death.

For the record, suicide is a selfish act. Wanting people to pay their respects is also a selfish act. And putting your opinion to others on the nobility of selfishness is a selfish act. People will always give themselves over to themselves. If a person does not want to suffer anymore, that is for them to decide. But I think you've got to be careful how you apply that comment to individual circumstances when it's likely that you've never walked in that person's shoes.