Joke of the Week!

[levey]

A woman standing nude in front of a mirror, says to her husband, "I look horrible, I feel fat & ugly, pay me a compliment."
He replies, "Your eyesight is perfect."


Wife gets naked & asks hubby, "What turns you on more, my pretty face or my sexy body?"
Husband looks her up & down and replies, "Your sense of humour!"

 

[fallowfieldflyer]

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but she listens in horror as one of the men says the following;

"Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, dey come together. I come again. Two asses, dey come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once-a more."

"You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"

"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Imma just tellun my friend howa ta spella Mississippi."

fckin brill

 

[yarny101]

whats brown and sticky ?

Anal !

 

[i8therags]

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but she listens in horror as one of the men says the following;

"Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, dey come together. I come again. Two asses, dey come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once-a more."

"You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"

"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Imma just tellun my friend howa ta spella Mississippi."

fckin brill

2nd that -quality

 

[mcfcblue]

whats the difference between a duck ?



one of its legs are both the same !

 

[jimharri]

whats the difference between a duck ?



one of its legs are both the same !

WTF?

 

[shaundickov]

What's black and screams?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron.

 

[tueartsboots]

What's black and screams?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron.

PMSL !

 

[Fourinarow]

"Don't laugh!" said the patient, Fred. "Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient." "Okay then," Fred said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest 'hoo-ha' the doctor had ever seen. It couldn't have been bigger than the size of a AAA battery. Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure. "I'm so sorry," said the doctor. "I really am. I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentlemen, I promise it won't happen again. Now what seems to be the problem?"
"It's swollen," Fred replied...

 

[yarny101]

I sent away for a penis enlarger. They sent me back a magnifying glass.