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Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
Zenith said:How do you make a queer have sex with a woman?
Take a shit in her cu.nt
This joke has the ability to empty your house on christmas day, i shouldnt like it but i kind of do
Paddy is stopped by
customs at the airport, carrying two large bulky sacks over his shoulder. They search the sacks & find loads of mobile phones in them. They ask why does he have all these phones & Paddy replies, "well, oi was on me travels in America &
got a call from me mate murphy in Cork & he told me he's starting up a jazz band & asked could I bring him back 2 saxophones?
customs at the airport, carrying two large bulky sacks over his shoulder. They search the sacks & find loads of mobile phones in them. They ask why does he have all these phones & Paddy replies, "well, oi was on me travels in America &
got a call from me mate murphy in Cork & he told me he's starting up a jazz band & asked could I bring him back 2 saxophones?
happy daze
Well-Known Member
Operation Yewtree has been adopted by the irish police....
Whenever they arrest three offenders.
Whenever they arrest three offenders.
crazyg
Well-Known Member
A guy gets stopped at Manchester Airport on the way back from a trip to Las Vegas.
Customs: what have you got in your case?
Guy: Shit!
Customs: Don't be a smart arse, what's in your case?
Guy: I've told you, shit!
Customs: Final chance pal, what's in your case?
Guy: Final time, shit!
On opening the case, the custom's officer found it to be full of - you've guessed it, SHIT!!
Customs: You dirty bastard, where did you get this?
Guy: Won it in a crap game!!
Customs: what have you got in your case?
Guy: Shit!
Customs: Don't be a smart arse, what's in your case?
Guy: I've told you, shit!
Customs: Final chance pal, what's in your case?
Guy: Final time, shit!
On opening the case, the custom's officer found it to be full of - you've guessed it, SHIT!!
Customs: You dirty bastard, where did you get this?
Guy: Won it in a crap game!!
ali benarbia's studs
Well-Known Member
went for a job interview a few days ago, the interviewer asked me what i thought my weaknesses were? i said "honesty"...... he started to laugh and say "well how would you think honesty is a weakness,i think it is a great quality in a person ". i said: "i don t give a fuck what you think!"
A guy goes to the Post Office to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"
He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee."
"Ok, have you ever been in the military service?"
"Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for one tour."
The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment." Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"
The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles."
The interviewer grimaces and then says, "Okay. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from
8 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. You can start tomorrow at 10 a.m., and plan on starting at 10 a.m. every day."
The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m., why don't you want me here until 10 a.m.?"
"This is a government job", the interviewer says. "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."
He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee."
"Ok, have you ever been in the military service?"
"Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for one tour."
The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment." Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"
The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles."
The interviewer grimaces and then says, "Okay. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from
8 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. You can start tomorrow at 10 a.m., and plan on starting at 10 a.m. every day."
The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m., why don't you want me here until 10 a.m.?"
"This is a government job", the interviewer says. "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."
It stopped being that about 150 pages agotommyhair said:Zuriblue said:Pain makes you stronger
Tears make you braver
Heartache makes you wiser
And Vodka makes you forget all that shit.
This is the joke thread
hackneyslim
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 24 Jul 2008
- Messages
- 1,730
What do you call the fat around a clitoris?
The wife.
The wife.