Joke thread

[Bill Walker]

Actually we have to own this one- it's taken in NZ (Nelson)

Bloody Kiwis:)

 

[Bill Walker]

 

[Match Fixer]

Why would you need to look at it twice, because it was you, come on own up/

 

[Mid Wales blue]

This bedding should not be used when you’ve consumed any type of psychedelic!

 

[fanatic1]

2 of Groucho Marx¨s pearls of wisdom.

When he was turned down as a member of the Hollywood hills swimming club for being of the Jewish faith he responded in writing. "can half Jews go in up to their waists?"

When asked to pick out a memorial plot at the Forest Lawns cemetery. he responded "On top of Marilyn Monroe".

 

[LWashington]

Take a look at this crap parking then take second look.

View attachment 84397

He obviously saw the "Stop" sign. So he's stopped driving and gone shopping.

 

[Lovebitesandeveryfing]

What sound do blue and white cows make in the meadows?

Blue moo…

(Just thought that up. You can tell, can't you? Alright, alright, I'll get my coat).

 

[Blue Mist]

I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

I wish to subscribe to his medication. I'm weird but fuck me, that's left of field.*




* I've never really understood why we use that phrase.

 

[BimboBob]

I wish to subscribe to his medication. I'm weird but fuck me, that's left of field.*




* I've never really understood why we use that phrase.

Baseball.

 

[Lavinda Past]

Baseball.

But why is the term used for something 'out of the ordinary'?
Don't they play on the left part of the field in baseball?