Joke thread

[NZBlue]

Thanks for that Swifty, I also thought The Verve wrote it. :)

No- it was Jagger and Richards

 

[Uwe Already]

A penguin was driving up the road when his car breaks down. Luckily he is right outside a garage, so he pops in and asks if they can look at it. “Pop back in half an hour, and we’ll let you know what’s up” says the mechanic. So the penguin goes off to Iceland for a tuna mayo sandwich, sits on a park bench for a bit, then waddles back to the garage. “Any news?“ He says “Looks like you’ve blown a seal” says the mechanic. The penguin wipes his mouth “No, no - it’s mayonnaise!”

 

[NZBlue]

View attachment 107068

Just checking I haven't offended anyone by liking this joke?

I, on the other hand, hope I've offended someone by liking it. It's just that I'm a bastard

 

[RadcliffeRick]

A penguin was driving up the road when his car breaks down. Luckily he is right outside a garage, so he pops in and asks if they can look at it. “Pop back in half an hour, and we’ll let you know what’s up” says the mechanic. So the penguin goes off to Iceland for a tuna mayo sandwich, sits on a park bench for a bit, then waddles back to the garage. “Any news?“ He says “Looks like you’ve blown a seal” says the mechanic. The penguin wipes his mouth “No, no - it’s mayonnaise!”

What kind of car??

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[KS55]

Actually, it was Schubert who wrote the Unfinished Symphony

Hey Schu, have you finished that symphony yet?
—Er no, I’m having a bit of trouble with my demisemiquavers.
Forget your snacks and get writing you lazy good for nothing.
—Actually I feel like death warmed up. I just can’t manage yet another arpeggio. Ugh…..

 

[sir baconface]

Just watching on the news about AI generated material. It’s very good but one of the give aways can be glitches that give AI generated figures 6 fingers. Does that mean Burnley doesn't actually exist and it’s always just been AI generated ?

Silly boy!

It wouldn’t be called “intelligence” if it had created Burnley.

 

[DrBlueBob]

What kind of car??

A Renault Pingu?