Three_Hat-tricks said:So the other night I stumbled out of the local, utterly arseholed. I saw a guy stood at the bus stop and I slurred to him "Do you know which way is north?" He replied "Hang on, I have a compass on me." I frowned angrily. "I'm lost you fucking useless ****. A fucking compass? How is drawing a fucking circle going to help me get home?!"
-- Sun Dec 29, 2013 7:10 pm --
I went to hospital last night to give a urine sample. "Can you go in the cubicle please?" the nurse asked. I did so and then she rested a beaker on the desktop, which was bizarrely fifteen feet away on the other side of the room. "Fill it up in your own time, sir."
I frowned. "What? All the way from over here?"
"Yes, that's it."
"Are you being serious?"
"No, sir. I'm taking the piss."
I concur. Maybe THt should seek some sort of professional help to improve his attitude, and therefore, his quality of life.citykev28 said:Three_Hat-tricks said:So the other night I stumbled out of the local, utterly arseholed. I saw a guy stood at the bus stop and I slurred to him "Do you know which way is north?" He replied "Hang on, I have a compass on me." I frowned angrily. "I'm lost you fucking useless ****. A fucking compass? How is drawing a fucking circle going to help me get home?!"
-- Sun Dec 29, 2013 7:10 pm --
I went to hospital last night to give a urine sample. "Can you go in the cubicle please?" the nurse asked. I did so and then she rested a beaker on the desktop, which was bizarrely fifteen feet away on the other side of the room. "Fill it up in your own time, sir."
I frowned. "What? All the way from over here?"
"Yes, that's it."
"Are you being serious?"
"No, sir. I'm taking the piss."
You were a bit out of order in the first story after asking which way was North and then becoming aggressive when the chap offered to help with the most suitable device I can think of.
The second tale suggests a poor attitude from the nurse but you've got a bit of a reputation as a difficult man to deal with so that may have gone before you.
Jimmy Carr joke ;)peoffrey said:Wayne Rooney likes to wear the number 10 shirt. Or, as he calls it, the stick and the circle.
citykev28 said:Three_Hat-tricks said:So the other night I stumbled out of the local, utterly arseholed. I saw a guy stood at the bus stop and I slurred to him "Do you know which way is north?" He replied "Hang on, I have a compass on me." I frowned angrily. "I'm lost you fucking useless ****. A fucking compass? How is drawing a fucking circle going to help me get home?!"
-- Sun Dec 29, 2013 7:10 pm --
I went to hospital last night to give a urine sample. "Can you go in the cubicle please?" the nurse asked. I did so and then she rested a beaker on the desktop, which was bizarrely fifteen feet away on the other side of the room. "Fill it up in your own time, sir."
I frowned. "What? All the way from over here?"
"Yes, that's it."
"Are you being serious?"
"No, sir. I'm taking the piss."
You were a bit out of order in the first story after asking which way was North and then becoming aggressive when the chap offered to help with the most suitable device I can think of.
The second tale suggests a poor attitude from the nurse but you've got a bit of a reputation as a difficult man to deal with so that may have gone before you.
sheikmedick said:Schumacher : going downhill faster than united ;))))
sheikmedick said:Schumacher : going downhill faster than united ;))))
Alex the Blue said:sheikmedick said:Schumacher : going downhill faster than united ;))))
I seriously hope none of your family ever have a brain injury.