Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
Is the correct answer.
Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
Is the correct answer.
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
An Englishman and a Dutchman are sitting in a pub. The Dutchman says to the Englishman, “Every time I see you in here you walk out with a different girl. What’s your secret?”
The Englishman replies, “It’s really easy. As soon as I walk into the pub, I casually toss my Rolls Royce keys onto the bar, and the gals practically throw themselves at me.”
The Dutchman says “Wow, you’ve got a Rolls Royce?”
The Englishman replies, “No, I’m just as poor as you. I bought this Rolls Royce key fob on Amazon for £10, and the ladies are none the wiser.”
So the Dutchman goes on Amazon and buys the exact same key fob. He then goes to various pubs across London, with no luck whatsoever. A few weeks later, he runs into the Englishman again. He tells the Englishman “Your key fob trick is bogus, I went to at least 20 pubs, no lady looked at me twice, please take this bad luck charm off my hands.”
The Englishman tells him, “Maybe it would work better if you took off your bicycle helmet first.”
The Englishman replies, “It’s really easy. As soon as I walk into the pub, I casually toss my Rolls Royce keys onto the bar, and the gals practically throw themselves at me.”
The Dutchman says “Wow, you’ve got a Rolls Royce?”
The Englishman replies, “No, I’m just as poor as you. I bought this Rolls Royce key fob on Amazon for £10, and the ladies are none the wiser.”
So the Dutchman goes on Amazon and buys the exact same key fob. He then goes to various pubs across London, with no luck whatsoever. A few weeks later, he runs into the Englishman again. He tells the Englishman “Your key fob trick is bogus, I went to at least 20 pubs, no lady looked at me twice, please take this bad luck charm off my hands.”
The Englishman tells him, “Maybe it would work better if you took off your bicycle helmet first.”
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
lefty goldblatt
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These origami puns just crease me up
Alan Harper's Tash
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Isn't it great progress that Monkey Pox has been re-named M Pox because the former was quite rightly described as a lazy, racist slur.
In unrelated news, I’m off to listen to some M People.
In unrelated news, I’m off to listen to some M People.
RiversideBlue
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To be fair. That's funnier than most of your jokes. I take it back.
RiversideBlue
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A man walked into a bar, sat down, and ordered a beer. As he sipped the beer, he heard a soothing voice say “nice tie!” Looking around, he noticed that the bar was empty except for himself and the bartender at the end of the bar. A few sips later, the voice said “beautiful shirt“. At this, the man called the bartender over. “Hey…I must be losing my mind,” he told the bartender. “I keep hearing these voices saying nice things, and there’s not a soul in here but us.” “It’s the peanuts,” answered the bartender. “Say what?” “You heard me,” said the barkeeper. “It’s the peanuts … they’re complimentary.“