Joke thread

[TangerineSteve17]

My shrink said I have a pre-occupation with revenge.

We'll see about that.

Reminds me of..

I went to the Doctors and said "Doctor, I feel as though the whole word is ganging up on me"
"I see" said the doctor, then he opened the door slightly and whispered "Hey lads, he's in here"

 

[Lavinda Past]

My shrink said I have a pre-occupation with revenge.

We'll see about that.

Reminds me of..

I went to the Doctors and said "Doctor, I feel as though the whole word is ganging up on me"
"I see" said the doctor, then he opened the door slightly and whispered "Hey lads, he's in here"

Oh no... That's awful... Were you badly hurt or did you escape?

 

[BimboBob]

I just put my phone on airplane mode and it disappeared.

 

[r.soleofsalford]

A to Sky, United have a chance of winning the Champions League.


This is the joke thread isnt it.

 

[Gabriel]

I just put my phone on airplane mode and it disappeared.

Oh, BB. you'll go to the burning fire.

Coffee all over the desk.

:-)

 

[TangerineSteve17]

My friend found out me and my wife were talking about him behind his back. He said "You disgust me!" I said "Yes we did."

 

[TangerineSteve17]

Why did Snoop Dogg need an Umbrella?

Fo' Drizzle

 

[hackneyslim]

Boeing, Boeing, gone.

 

[Alex the Blue]

Manchester United have just announced they have sold the naming rights to Old Trafford. With immediate effect Old Trafford will now be known as the O3 Stadium.

 

[Phil Meup]

A bloke comes home from work to find his wife packing a suitcase.
'I'm leaving' she says 'going to London.'
What are you going to do there ? he asks.
'Well, what I did for you last night, I'd get £100 for that in London.'
'I'm coming with you' he says, ' I want to see how you exist on £200 a year!'