Joke thread

[Big Swifty]

She was only an admiral's daughter........

But her naval base was full of discharged seamen

 

[kashmir]

She was only the road makers daughter


But she always liked her asphalt

 

[KS55]

She was only a pilot's daughter, but she kept her cockpit clean.

 

[ray21]

She was only the barman’s daughter, but she liked in cider.

 

[ray21]

What is the difference between a clitoris and a bud light....
A clitoris only taste like piss for a second.

 

[kashmir]

She was a Yorkshire mans daughter

but she loved to have her Huddersfield

 

[manclad]

She was only a welders daughter but she had acetylene tits.

 

[manclad]

She was only a cricketers daughter but she would always take a full toss in the crease.

 

[theinvisibleman]

One for the more mature readers on here. She was only a mineral maker's daughter but she knew how to Slack & Cox...

 

[TheRemainsOfTheDave]

She was only the fishmonger's daughter but she laid on the slab and said "Fillet!".

 

[East Level 2]

She was only the bird keeper's daughter but she liked a cockatoo.

 

[crazyg]

She was only a General's daughter, but she knew what Regiment.

 

[crazyg]

She was a Yorkshire mans daughter

but she loved to have her Huddersfield and her Arsenal.

Amended

 

[mccity]

Knock knock?
Who's there?
It's the police ma'am! Your son has been hit by a drunk driver. He's dead.

 

[rushts]

Knock knock?
Who's there?
It's the police ma'am! Your son has been hit by a drunk driver. He's dead.

Your son has been hit by a drunk driver. Hes dead who?

 

[Sam Armstrong]

Find a penny,
Pick it up,
And all day long
You'll have good luck!

* *Advice not valid in prison showers

 

[Cotswold Knight]

Knock knock
Who’s there
Jeremy Corbyn
Fuck off you Terrorist sympathising scum bag

 

[kippax4ever]

Knock knock
Who’s there
Jeremy Corbyn
Fuck off you Terrorist sympathising scum bag

I see Dianne Abbott said you got 300 likes

 

[KS55]

I see Dianne Abbott said you got 300 likes

At £5 a shot, that's £150.

 

[kippax4ever]

At £5 a shot, that's £150.

Well at least your good at maths..