Joke thread

[Ancient Citizen]

At school, my favourite lesson used to be PE, due to the fact that I had the biggest dick in the class.
I used to love strolling around the changing rooms bollock naked,flicking the weaker kids with the tip
of my towel whilst pointing and smirking at the ones with the little knobs.
Looking back, I think that's why I was sacked.

 

[Sir peace frog]

At school, my favourite lesson used to be PE, due to the fact that I had the biggest dick in the class.
I used to love strolling around the changing rooms bollock naked,flicking the weaker kids with the tip
of my towel whilst pointing and smirking at the ones with the little knobs.
Looking back, I think that's why I was sacked.

haha ,didn't know fred the weather was a forum member

 

[Ancient Citizen]

At school, my favourite lesson used to be PE, due to the fact that I had the biggest dick in the class.
I used to love strolling around the changing rooms bollock naked,flicking the weaker kids with the tip
of my towel whilst pointing and smirking at the ones with the little knobs.
Looking back, I think that's why I was sacked.

haha ,didn't know fred the weather was a forum member

I thought it rather topical, seeing the old perv is now languishing at Her Majesty's pleasure.

 

[jimharri]

An oldie, but a gody;

Q. How do people know Jesus wasn't born in Liverpool ?
A. You try finding 3 wise men and a virgin there!

 

[chris63]

"We're going to be together for the rest of our lives," smiled my girlfriend as we flew out to our dream holiday in Hawaii.

"You seem pretty sure of yourself," I replied.

"I am," she said, gazing out the window. "The left wing's fallen off and the engine's on fire."

 

[chris63]

I met a man in a pub last night and we ended up going back to his house.
After a few more drinks, we started kissing and having a bit of foreplay on the sofa.
he looked at me and said, "Let's take this upstairs."
I said, "Okay, you grab one end and I'll grab the other."
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[chris63]

Went to see the worst faith healer ever last night.
He was so bad, a bloke in a wheelchair got up and walked out.

 

[chris63]

THE Rhino Horn Syndrome"
*" If we can manage to convince the Chinese that Jihadists' testicles are aphrodisiacs, within ten years they'll have disappeared..."

 

[chris63]

What did the pirate say when he turned 80?
Aye matey.

 

[taleofbluehalves]

I was in a public restroom when a bloke banged on the door.

"I'm having a poo," I shouted, "Just wait."

He said, "How long?"

I said, "About eight inches at a guess, I don't have a ruler."