lefty goldblatt
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Use your loaf
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Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
Vicious111
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A couple attending an art exhibition at the National Gallery were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused. The painting depicted three black men totally naked sitting on a park bench. Two of the figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis.
The curator of the gallery realised that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his assessment. He went on for nearly half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of Afro-Americans in a predominantly white, patriarchal society. "In fact," he pointed out "some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society.
"After the curator left, a Scottish man approached the couple and said, "Would you like to know what the painting is really about?" "Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the gallery.?" asked the couple. " Because I`m the guy who painted it," he replied. "In fact there's no African-Americans depicted at all. They`re just three Scottish coal miners and the guy in the middle went home for lunch.
The curator of the gallery realised that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his assessment. He went on for nearly half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of Afro-Americans in a predominantly white, patriarchal society. "In fact," he pointed out "some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society.
"After the curator left, a Scottish man approached the couple and said, "Would you like to know what the painting is really about?" "Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the gallery.?" asked the couple. " Because I`m the guy who painted it," he replied. "In fact there's no African-Americans depicted at all. They`re just three Scottish coal miners and the guy in the middle went home for lunch.
Big Swifty
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A couple attending an art exhibition at the National Gallery were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused. The painting depicted three black men totally naked sitting on a park bench. Two of the figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis.
The curator of the gallery realised that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his assessment. He went on for nearly half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of Afro-Americans in a predominantly white, patriarchal society. "In fact," he pointed out "some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society.
"After the curator left, a Scottish man approached the couple and said, "Would you like to know what the painting is really about?" "Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the gallery.?" asked the couple. " Because I`m the guy who painted it," he replied. "In fact there's no African-Americans depicted at all. They`re just three Scottish coal miners and the guy in the middle went home for lunch.
This reminds me of the US painter who had to paint a picture of General Custer's last stand at the battle of the Little Bighorn. When the painting was revealed, a gasp of horror went up as the onlookers saw a group of fish wearing halos and various couples in feathered headdresses copulating wildly.
"What's all this about?" asks the gallery director, in shock.
"Well, it's what Custer said on finding himself in deep trouble" replies the artist- - "Holy mackerel - fucking Indians!'"
Last edited:
Big Swifty
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Which have been the two worst winters in living memory?
Mike and Bernie.....
Mike and Bernie.....
DrBlueBob
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Eeeeeeeeeeehh!Which have been the two worst winters in living memory?
Mike and Bernie.....
TheRemainsOfTheDave
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Went shopping this morning in town and walked past three street acts that were singing Frank Sinatra songs, two performing Sammy Davis Jr numbers and another doing Dean Martin.
I'll be glad when this croonervirus is over.
I'll be glad when this croonervirus is over.
Sam Armstrong
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I was in the chemist earlier and I said to the assistant “What gets rid of coronavirus?”
She said "Ammonia cleaner."
I said "Oh sorry, I thought you worked here...”
She said "Ammonia cleaner."
I said "Oh sorry, I thought you worked here...”
aguero93:20
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Piece of piss to get rid of it so?I was in the chemist earlier and I said to the assistant “What gets rid of coronavirus?”
She said "Ammonia cleaner."
I said "Oh sorry, I thought you worked here...”
I was in tescos the other day when I passed a massive pile of shit in the fruit n veg aisle, it fcking stank too,and everyone was disgusted. Staff moved pretty quickly though, security were dragging me out before I had even pulled my trousers back up!!
Uwe Already
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I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday. I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.