Joke thread

[KS55]

View attachment 54796

I’m 74 and I would be grateful if you could pm me a copy of said leaflet.

 

[dickie davies]

 

[RadcliffeRick]

I’m 74 and I would be grateful if you could pm me a copy of said leaflet.

And maybe a map on how to get there?

 

[mat]

Another good TV spectacle for Liberty Media at least.

After Spa and today. I do wonder if Hamilton might say fuck it. If he's lost the team it's time to go.

 

[JASR]

Another good TV spectacle for Liberty Media at least.

After Spa and today. I do wonder if Hamilton might say fuck it. If he's lost the team it's time to go.

Joke 1/10 for effort
Punchline 0/10 for humour

 

[snorky]

Another good TV spectacle for Liberty Media at least.

After Spa and today. I do wonder if Hamilton might say fuck it. If he's lost the team it's time to go.

Does he get on his bike (that he left outside) then?

 

[mat]

Does he get on his bike (that he left outside) then?

I knew a cultured gentleman like yourself would understand the nuances of it.

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

I was sitting in the pub doing a Crossword when I turned to my Scottish mate @Blue Mist and said."I'm stuck on one.

’Stranded On An Island’, eight letters."

"Marooned" He said.

”About fucking time" I replied. "I'll have a lager."

 

[northendenton]

I was sitting in the pub doing a Crossword when I turned to my Scottish mate @Blue Mist and said."I'm stuck on one.

’Stranded On An Island’, eight letters."

"Marooned" He said.

”About fucking time" I replied. "I'll have a lager."

Musical instrument 3 letters starting with A ,,, I put Accordian but i had to squeeze it in

 

[AlexWilliamsGloves]

Fred Best

 

[J.G.Blue.]

Musical instrument 3 letters starting with A ,,, I put Accordian but i had to squeeze it in

Did you know the bloke who invented crosswords is buried in manchesters southern cemetery?
As you go through the front gates his grave is seven across & three down.

 

[MellowJoe]

Did you know the bloke who invented crosswords is buried in manchesters southern cemetery?
As you go through the front gates his grave is seven across & three down.

I can never remember his name.. could be P something, something, T something something

 

[bluemoon32]

One winter day, Fred’s neighbour Sam, came up to Fred’s door and started pounding on it.

Fred answered the door. “Sam, what’s up?” he said.

Sam angrily replied, “That no good son of yours has been pissing in the snow on my back garden!”

Fred asked, “How do you know it was my son?”

Sam answered, “He wrote his name in piss!”

“Okay,” Fred replied. “I’ll talk to him about it, but I have to say, I don’t see what the big deal is. It’s just piss in the snow. Why are you so fired up about it?”

Sam snapped back, “It’s in my daughter’s handwriting!“

 

[DrBlueBob]

Fred Best

I never knew Gordon Banks played for that lot.

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]