Joke thread

[Bill Walker]

Bank employee goes into the managers office and says"Gilbert o Sullivan is here to see you"
Manager "what the he'll does he want "
Employee " A loan again naturally "

 

[dronefromsector7G]

I saw Arnold Schwarzenegger eating a chocolate egg so I said to him, "I bet I know what your favourite Christian festival is." He said, "Have to love Easter, baby!"

 

[idahoblues]

I saw Arnold Schwarzenegger eating a chocolate egg so I said to him, "I bet I know what your favourite Christian festival is." He said, "Have to love Easter, baby!"

Go to bed

****

 

[dronefromsector7G]

Go to bed

****

Shut it murderer

 

[idahoblues]

Shut it murderer

Don't forget it

 

[ColinBellsjockstrap]

 

[Ancient Citizen]

Watching Terry Waite now on telly reminded me of a joke, by Manning I think it was...

Terry Waite on Mastermind.

''Terry, what is your specialised subject?''

''Beirut radiators, 1987 to 1991.''

 

[Indaparkside]

I’ve just left my wife as every time she cook’s she sings songs by Bob Marley

So no woman no pie

 

[Blue Mist]

I’ve just left my wife as every time she cook’s she sings songs by Bob Marley

So no woman no pie

Very good but I wonder if you know the origins of that song ?

Bob Marley came to Manchester to do a concert and after the gig he went into the Grey Horse on Portland Street and asked for a Lambs Navy rum but was told they didn't have any so he asked for a pork pie. Again the landlord said they were sold out. He went home and feeling fed up, sat down and wrote the song ' No rum and no pie.'

 

[Indaparkside]

Very good but I wonder if you know the origins of that song ?

Bob Marley came to Manchester to do a concert and after the gig he went into the Grey Horse on Portland Street and asked for a Lambs Navy rum but was told they didn't have any so he asked for a pork pie. Again the landlord said they were sold out. He went home and feeling fed up, sat down and wrote the song ' No rum and no pie.'

Then he got done for drunk and disorderly the police took his weed so
No ganja to get high