Joke thread

A man wakes up in hospital after a terrible car crash with no penis.
The Doctor says this is the best hospital in the country for penis transplants.
"We have an English one for £2000, we have a Scottish one for £3000 and a West Indian one for £5000 it will take 5 minutes no problem."
The man says "I always discuss finance matters with my wife."
"She's in the waiting room I'll get her" says the Doctor.
Five minutes later the Doctor comes back and says "Have you made a decision"?
"Yes" says the man...
"We're having a new kitchen"
 

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