Joke thread

[Bill Walker]

My obese parrot has just died , I know it's sad but at least it's a weight off my shoulders

 

[sir baconface]

Shortages have forced The Who to cancel their UK tour.

A brief statement from their road manager said “We won’t get fuelled again”.

 

[balotellishaircut]

Shortages have forced The Who to cancel their UK tour.

A brief statement from their road manager said “We won’t get fuelled again”.

I CSI what you did there. ;)

 

[dronefromsector7G]

I've opened up a shop selling uncaged birds… They are flying off the shelves!

 

[Tuearts right boot]

Shortages have forced The Who to cancel their UK tour.

A brief statement from their road manager said “We won’t get fuelled again”.

O'Riley...!!

 

[lefty goldblatt]

Shortages have forced The Who to cancel their UK tour.

A brief statement from their road manager said “We won’t get fuelled again”.

Maybe they could use their magic bus

 

[Bill Walker]

I found out this week the best time to call your partner a fat cow is in a buffet queue.

She really wants to storm off, but..............

 

[blue44]

 

[Big Swifty]

I've opened up a shop selling uncaged birds… They are flying off the shelves!

.....and I am selling explosive devices disguised as prayer mats - the prophets are going through the roof (yes, I know, it was on here a year ago)

 

[KS55]

I have been appointed to an important post with the city of Amsterdam.
They have put me in charge of all the dykes. Just my luck.