Joke thread

horlock_was_super said:
Really? Even the indoor one?
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Yes, especially the slip her one.

blue44 said:
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Tried to start my car this morning but it just wouldn't turn over. I tried a number of times but nothing.

Then I noticed a bat perched on the bonnet. I got out to open the bonnet but the bat wouldn't move. It told me how smart I looked. I was shocked but just said "Thank You".

It then told me I'd lost weight since it last saw me. Again I thanked it for the compliment.

It then said I could probably pull any woman I wanted.

Bat flattery.
 
I took my wife to the new Eskimo restaurant last night, we asked to see the menu and the waiter said “We don’t have many options so I’ll run through it with you”
He said “We have whale meat steaks, whale meat curry, whale meat stir fry, and of course our weekly special “The Vera Lynn” I said “What’s the Vera Lynn ?” The waiter said “Whale meat again”


(a very old joke)
 
balotellishaircut said:
I took my wife to the new Eskimo restaurant last night, we asked to see the menu and the waiter said “We don’t have many options so I’ll run through it with you”
He said “We have whale meat steaks, whale meat curry, whale meat stir fry, and of course our weekly special “The Vera Lynn” I said “What’s the Vera Lynn ?” The waiter said “Whale meat again”


(a very old joke)
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Whale meat again, a great album by Jim Capaldi.
 
balotellishaircut said:
I took my wife to the new Eskimo restaurant last night, we asked to see the menu and the waiter said “We don’t have many options so I’ll run through it with you”
He said “We have whale meat steaks, whale meat curry, whale meat stir fry, and of course our weekly special “The Vera Lynn” I said “What’s the Vera Lynn ?” The waiter said “Whale meat again”


(a very old joke)
Click to expand...
My secondary school art teacher ( who fancied himself as a bit of a comedian) told the whole class this very joke at our first ever lesson with him.

That was September 1976.

Cheers for making me feel really fucking old you twat!
 
horlock_was_super said:
My secondary school art teacher ( who fancied himself as a bit of a comedian) told the whole class this very joke at our first ever lesson with him.

That was September 1976.

Cheers for making me feel really fucking old you twat!
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Don't be so harsh, it took him ages to translate it from the original Latin!!
 
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