Life without kids??

jay_mcfc said:
You might not change your mind and you might think this is patronising but there's at least a decent chance your missus will. Women's hormones do weird things from the mid-thirties onwards and once the clock starts ticking the feelings will intensify.
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It's not patronising: it's nature and I have seen it happen multiple times.
 
I have two boys, nearly seven and almost five, the youngest being autistic with very basic verbal communication.

That was hard, learning to learn a different way of knowing your child.

As he's only five he's still learning himself, of course, but the moments of receiving a kiss from the eldest, out of the blue as I lay on the couch, to my little 'un draping himself around me and pulling my arms over him is untold joy. I never take anything like this for granted as I never learned it as a child.

Far far outweighs the irritating times they can bring!
 
I dunno if I want kids and while I'm thinking that I won't have any as once you do there is no going back. Heard way too many stories of people who regret having kids and what their life has become and there being no escape from it. Maybe I'll change my mind, maybe I won't. But I do think it's something you have to be 100% on board with. Even if you have the smallest doubt you shouldn't take the risk.
 
Andrea Leadsom is very interested in this thread.
 
Other things I have found after going through it twice is that they are incredibly messy! If you like neat and tidy you will not sit down ever!

Oh and your partner will probably change too. I have seen this loads including mine. Being a mum is the most important thing! It's something that you have to adapt to and grow with.

Kids are good fun but hard work. It doesn't get any easier when they hit 17/18 onwards either. The worry of them coming home at night and not getting into fights is a problem. Their emotional pain can hurt you and they never stop expecting money off you!
 
I was told by countless people i would change my mind when i got married and got older,used to really piss me off, now i get i bet you regret not having them,NO I DON'T,don't put constant pressure on women who don't want them please
Rant over lol
 
worsleyweb said:
You will change your mind.
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SWP's back said:
First I want to say that this reply isn't meant to be any offence to you personally.

Having said that "oh you'll change your mind" is the most patronising thing that people with children can say.

I really won't, I have zero interest in having children and I speak for all childless couples when I say that we really couldn't give a shit for hearing about what little Johnny is up to now either.
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THANK YOU.

I am sick of people saying that i will change my mind, or "it'll just happen" - it just happening is why we have so many little scrotes producing even littler scrotes. Some of us are able to control pregnancy, and will do, because we just don't want it.
 
I think if both people don't want children it is pretty straightforward really but in the ops case if she does and he doesn't there are only two options, he should relent or they should go there separate ways. It really does depend on how strongly he feels really.
 
karen7 said:
I was told by countless people i would change my mind when i got married and got older,used to really piss me off, now i get i bet you regret not having them,NO I DON'T,don't put constant pressure on women who don't want them please
Rant over lol
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Ditto (except for the being a woman bit!). I do have a stepson though.

Never wanted my own kids for one bloody good reason. I don't fucking like them.
 
OB1 said:
It's not patronising: it's nature and I have seen it happen multiple times.
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No. It's patronising. It assumes you know the innermost feelings of others simply because you can't empathise with another viewpoint. It's also fucking annoying.
 
karen7 said:
I was told by countless people i would change my mind when i got married and got older,used to really piss me off, now i get i bet you regret not having them,NO I DON'T,don't put constant pressure on women who don't want them please
Rant over lol
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Thanks you! X
 
Never, ever wanted kids, and have my never for one second regretted it. Don't like kids, don't like stories about other people's kids even when they force pictures on you to ask if you think little Emma or Steven isn't the cutest thing you've ever seen. No he's not, he looks like every other fucking kid I've ever seen. Can't abide cunts who to this day still say shit like 'do you not regret never having them'.......... No I don't you ****, now fuck off and bond with your fucking rug rat and don't pester me with pictures of the little **** or shite anecdotes about what the little fucker done yesterday.

That's me done.
 
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malg said:
Never, ever wanted kids, and have my never for one second regretted it. Don't like kids, don't like stories about other people's kids even when they force pictures on you to ask if you think little Emma or Steven isn't the cutest thing you've ever seen. No he's not, he looks like every other fucking kid I've ever seen. Can't abide cunts who to this day still say shit like 'do you not regret never having them'.......... No don't you ****, now fuck off and bond with your fucking rug rat and don't pester me with pictures of the little **** or shite anecdotes about what the little fucker done yesterday.

That's me done.
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Like it malg :-)
 
malg said:
Never, ever wanted kids, and have my never for one second regretted it. Don't like kids, don't like stories about other people's kids even when they force pictures on you to ask if you think little Emma or Steven isn't the cutest thing you've ever seen. No he's not, he looks like every other fucking kid I've ever seen. Can't abide cunts who to this day still say shit like 'do you not regret never having them'.......... No don't you ****, now fuck off and bond with your fucking rug rat and don't pester me with pictures of the little **** or shite anecdotes about what the little fucker done yesterday.

That's me done.
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*applauds*

I think a lot of it comes from people with kids miss not having kids. Therefore they project to try and make happy people without kids feel as though they are missing something.

I've met lots of people with kids that regret it, I'm yet to meet a happily married childless couple that are sad about not having them.

Each to their own as I keep saying.
 
Its funny because having met SWP's Back on a few occasions, I think you would make a great dad!
There are plenty of fathers out there who really don't give a shit about their kids!!!
But I can appreciate that the whole kids thing isn't your thing.
 
Interesting thread.

Throughout my late teens and early/mid 20s, was adamant I didn't want any. Far too selfish for such responsibility. I think that stance has softened somewhat as I approach 30 next March, though as it stands I'm still not eager to have any. I think a lot will depend on who is unlucky enough to settle down with me; if they want kids then I'll definitely be open to that route, equally if they say they have no interest in kids then I think I'd also be perfectly fine with that outcome. Maybe its too serious a topic to sit on the fence with? But the fence is where I'm sat currently :)

One thing I know for sure, I'm so glad I've had my 20s pretty much all to myself (sounds selfish I know but it is what it is). Been fortunate enough to travel large parts of the world, watch loads of City games at home and abroad, gigs, nights out, never had to turn down an invite as couldn't find a babysitter etc etc, so from that perspective no regrets whatsoever.
 
malg said:
Never, ever wanted kids, and have my never for one second regretted it. Don't like kids, don't like stories about other people's kids even when they force pictures on you to ask if you think little Emma or Steven isn't the cutest thing you've ever seen. No he's not, he looks like every other fucking kid I've ever seen. Can't abide cunts who to this day still say shit like 'do you not regret never having them'.......... No I don't you ****, now fuck off and bond with your fucking rug rat and don't pester me with pictures of the little **** or shite anecdotes about what the little fucker done yesterday.

That's me done.
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Agreed! I like to use the words 'fuck trophy' to describe their little rug rats. Whilst on the subject of kids, is it just me or are parents getting so much worse, kids screaming around in restaurants, parents oblivious to tha fact that their kids are pissing everyone else off while they look gooey eyed at them. There's a growing trend of adult only resorts popping up for this very reason
 
gazhinio said:
Its funny because having met SWP's Back on a few occasions, I think you would make a great dad!
There are plenty of fathers out there who really don't give a shit about their kids!!!
But I can appreciate that the whole kids thing isn't your thing.
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I don't, if he had a son poor kid would be blinding passers by with his shiny crown by the age of 20, and he'd charge consultation fees for pocket money.
 
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