Mental Illness

[adammck]

Fair enough that you don't agree with me, your choice and your opinion. I'm wondering if those that don't agree have been themselves or had a family member in a similar position? Secondly I'd like to know why you would think it's bollocks? Is it because "they can't help it", "it's not their fault" etc, etc. I heard it many, many times in court rooms and from "mental health experts" over the course of numerous court appearances, as far as I'm concerned they were the ones talking bollocks.
No one forced my sister to smoke weed to excess, her choice and the "problems" she had apparently started when she ramped up her use of it, you make your bed........

Chris, why do you think she increased her use of weed?

The issues most likely occurred before that.

You're allowed your opinion, and you can speak through experiences, but I really don't think you get it. This is the perfect example why this lad's bird needs to get professional treatment, most likely so does your sister. It's a sad situation but you can't say "you make your bed", the issues were most likely around long before that and weed was an escape for her.

 

[Chris Mac]

Her marriage went down the pan, first she boozed and I mean boozed to excess for a couple of years then she got into the weed and on it went from there. I know plenty of people , myself included ,whose marriages have gone tits up but they haven't stabbed two of their social workers 'cos they couldn't get their own way. Right up until the break up she was great, not a care in the world, good job, plenty of cash etc. She just wanted everyone to pity her instead of dusting herself off and getting on with life. I went on a 3 month bender when my marriage broke up then realised I couldn't do that for the rest of my life so made the decision to get my life back on track. She didn't and the rest is history as they say.

 

[adammck]

I've had a someone very close to me effected, for years.

It's a complex illness and it's different for everyone. Something you may be able to handle, doesn't mean your sister can. It's effect people differently and you cannot expect someone to recover because you did.

You're lucky that you were concious that you couldn't live that way. Her mind has most likely got in such an unhealthy state that she doesn't even know any more. By what you said then she should definitely be assessed by a professional. Meds, therapy, could help, but I'm not a doctor and that's really the starting point to her problems. You can just hope she "comes out of it", but she might get worse. You're her Brother, you should try and give it a crack to help her find an answer and support her. We all don't deal with our problems the same way... Some better then others.

 

[BlueSam]

Can I just say that the person in question doesnt smoke, drink or do drugs and never has any of the above. Apart from the occaisional drink every few months or something for a doo.

 

[BimboBob]

Never realised that my family have a history of mental illness until i started to do my family tree.

My Grandma hung herself when i was 4 (was always told she just died).
My Uncle shot himself.
My Great grandma jumped off a building.
My Auntie in Canada has just been sectioned for her own safety.
My Brother has had issues in the past and occasionally will relapse but we know the signs now.

None of the above had other life issues that i know off, although my Brother is a Derby County fan.

Is it hereditary?

 

[BlueSam]

This is what her family tree is like. Grandma. Mum and brother all issues and now her it looks like but she has other brothers n sisters who are fine

 

[Cheesy]

Never realised that my family have a history of mental illness until i started to do my family tree.

My Grandma hung herself when i was 4 (was always told she just died).
My Uncle shot himself.
My Great grandma jumped off a building.
My Auntie in Canada has just been sectioned for her own safety.
My Brother has had issues in the past and occasionally will relapse but we know the signs now.

None of the above had other life issues that i know off, although my Brother is a Derby County fan.

Is it hereditary?

It can be. What many people still seem unable to grasp is that depression is a physical illness, so like many other physical illnesses there can be a genetic link.

<a class="postlink" href="http://www.allaboutdepression.com/cau_03.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.allaboutdepression.com/cau_03.html</a>

 

[TFC]

Thats a tough spot to be in blue, and to be honest I dont know what I would do in your shoes.

Like a lot of others on here, I also have someone very close to me who is a diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic and having been around it for a long time, the only advice I can really offer is that whether you think you can help her or not by being around her, its only really professional help that can get her on the right path.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.

 

[gbillyblue]

recently i was diagnosed with bipolar 2 which mirrors my life as a city fan some highs but mostly lows.

looking forward to tonight.

Blue Moon
You saw me standing alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own

Blue Moon
You know just what I was there for
You heard me saying a prayer for
Someone I really could care for

And then there suddenly appeared before me
The only one my arms will ever hold
I heard somebody whisper please adore me
And then I looked to the Moon it turned to gold

Blue Moon
Now I'm no longer alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own

 

[didactic]

Anyone ever had experience of someone they know developing mental illness?. Been in a relationship for 3 years which allthough had its amazing times also was basically me paying for my gf to change. I organised college courses and gave her money and housing etc but we just kept arguing.. I kept being told I was controlling her and so I left about a month ago.

I got a call from her college tutor yesterday saying she hasnt been in weeks so I rang her.

She sais she isnt leaving the house anymore.. She hasnt tidied in ages and she decided to cut her benefits off which would leave her homless .

She also randomly started talking to me about a family friend from her past who she thinks was a pedophile. She might be right but its making alarm bells ring

She is literally the nicest person in the world. Her lifes goal is to build an animal shelter. I just love her so much but her not getting a job and also jealousy issues made me leave.

I am now working full time and also at university. I am sat at my desk right now when i am meant to be studying pretty much crying over what might be about to happen to her.

I should say that her brother is a full blown paranoid schizphreniac and her family fucking suck. They kicked all their kids out at early ages.
I want to hell her but I dont know if I am better just severing ties.. But then what if she kills herself and I could have stopped it if I only spent some time with her.

I just put 100quid in her account and begged her to see her gp. I am booked myself into counselling next week. I have never felt pain like this. The emotions are so confusing.

Its like i feel like she is the perfect person and I would marry her if she got stable but now by leaving her im worried im pushing her towards an ultimate suicide.

I am sorry for the vent but ive got no one to talk to about this until my counselling next week and i am in proper pain.

Firstly its not your fault these things happen in life and there is no way of predicting them or saying "if I had done such and such". If her brother and other family members suffer from mental issues the chances are much higher she too would develop some sort of issue. It is very difficult because you have to understand that the person you once cared for is no longer behaving the same or even thinking the same. Tread carefully because caring for someone is a very long way from being able to provide a solution specially with something like this. What you want to avoid is putting yourself in a stressful position or one where you could even be at risk all because you are trying to help. I suggest getting her the help she needs through formal channels, professional people who know the best way to treat and help people in these situations.

Be there as a friend and for emotional support but do not get too involved as this could confuse her emotionally leading to even more issues. From the sounds of it she suffers from depression but there could be something else going on. Dont beat yourself about this it happens to more than people than you think and most live a normal trouble free life once diagnosed and given the proper medication. Getting all wound up and stressing yourself out is not the answer try and find practical ways you can help but dont give her money or then you will feel even more guilty when you cannot support her.

Good luck and remember its not your fault.