It's possible you're doing it wrong - McDonalds don't book tables.
Or maybe you and your family are blacklisted. Possibly for stealing cutlery.
I'm not saying that's what's happened. I'm not saying, "its a Barm, of Warrington - and all his family - have stolen vast amounts of cutlery at every single restaurant in the GM area, which they resell at carboots." I'm not saying, "There's photographic evidence on the web, there's video and everything, of its a Barm of Warrington and all his family making off from pubs and restaurants with knives, forks, spoons falling out of their trouser legs." Nope. I'm not saying anything about multiple witnesses including retired judges, schoolteachers, and other professionals reporting this. I'm not saying they've concluded beyond any doubt, that Warrington based its a Barm and his whole family are cutlery thieves and cheapskates on an industrial scale. I'm not saying those fine and upstanding witnesses sadly report that it's been confirmed multiple times that its a Barm's entire family spend their days going from coffee shop to coffee shop to order one small babycino before leaving said establishments carrying plastic bags full of vast amounts of plastic stirrers and napkins. I'm not saying you intended to make a wedding dress out of them. I'm not saying photographs of this entire scheme exist and are out there on the web.
I'm not saying any of that. I'm just saying - the truth will out. People can look at the evidence for themselves - they don't need me to make up their minds how much cutlery theft you and your family may or may not be responsible for. Maybe you're not responsible for any.... maybe some might even believe that. Maybe some wouldn't. But that's up to them to find out who you really are, and why some are calling you Mr and Mrs Spoon. And when they see you can't get a table for Sunday dinner, they'll come to their own conclusions about why that might be the case. And then they'll decide for themselves, if, or how, word might have been passed around about cutlery theft - won't they.
It's possible you're doing it wrong - McDonalds don't book tables.
Or maybe you and your family are blacklisted. Possibly for stealing cutlery.
I'm not saying that's what's happened. I'm not saying, "its a Barm, of Warrington - and all his family - have stolen vast amounts of cutlery at every single restaurant in the GM area, which they resell at carboots." I'm not saying, "There's photographic evidence on the web, there's video and everything, of its a Barm of Warrington and all his family making off from pubs and restaurants with knives, forks, spoons falling out of their trouser legs." Nope. I'm not saying anything about multiple witnesses including retired judges, schoolteachers, and other professionals reporting this. I'm not saying they've concluded beyond any doubt, that Warrington based its a Barm and his whole family are cutlery thieves and cheapskates on an industrial scale. I'm not saying those fine and upstanding witnesses sadly report that it's been confirmed multiple times that its a Barm's entire family spend their days going from coffee shop to coffee shop to order one small babycino before leaving said establishments carrying plastic bags full of vast amounts of plastic stirrers and napkins. I'm not saying you intended to make a wedding dress out of them. I'm not saying photographs of this entire scheme exist and are out there on the web.
I'm not saying any of that. I'm just saying - the truth will out. People can look at the evidence for themselves - they don't need me to make up their minds how much cutlery theft you and your family may or may not be responsible for. Maybe you're not responsible for any.... maybe some might even believe that. Maybe some wouldn't. But that's up to them to find out who you really are, and why some are calling you Mr and Mrs Spoon. And when they see you can't get a table for Sunday dinner, they'll come to their own conclusions about why that might be the case. And then they'll decide for themselves, if, or how, word might have been passed around about cutlery theft - won't they.
Fuck me it was only a salt and pepper pots.