Fuck me. You are a Manchester City defender leading 2-1 with 5 minutes left. A long hopeful ball to no-one is punted into your area. Do you:
a) get in the way of your team mate and end up panicking and hacking the ball needlessly out for a corner,
b) scuff it straight into your team mate's shins so it rebounds into the path of one of the opposition,
c) leave it to each other so one of the opposition nips in and nicks it,
d) attempt an utterly needless and suicidal pass to a team mate stood 2 yards away that he can't possibly hope to control
e) actually clear the fucking ball 60 yards to safety
If you answered a), b), c) or d), there's a fair chance Pellers will be on the blower next week offering you a trial. If you answered e), you are not Alex Kolarov, Bacary Sagna, Nicolas Otamendi or Vincent Kompany. It doesn't matter if we're brilliant or shit, the capacity of those bastards to take years off my life never changes.
Hats off to Ya Ya for a nerveless penalty, and hats off to Otters for the best salmon like bullet header since Mick McCarthy stuck it up the rag's arsehole circa 1986 at Maine Road, but other than that we made a right pig's ear of it. Still won though, which was crucial, and hopefully Silva and Kun will be back for the Dippers.
Oh, and a quick fuck off to that fat bastard Robert Madley. 5 minutes stoppage time for starters, and yet we were still playing at 96:05 when Sterling got upended. Anyone think we'd have still been playing a millisecond beyond that 5 minute mark if we'd been losing? Would we chuff. He added 4 against West Ham (and it should have been 10, such was the time wasting) when the shoe was on the other foot....!