Cheers. Don‘t know if this will make sense - but years ago when I smoked, I sometimes used to find that I would become more attuned to music. As the night went on, I would find myself turning the volume down on the stereo in order to effectively keep the music at the same level in my experience. Would wake up the next day, turn the stereo on and barely be able to hear the music. And I have something similar with the, erm, sensation of beauty these days. That it feels like when I am open to this beauty, then the same music is somehow richer, more vibrant, more enjoyable. Is wonderful. I also have a sense that this experience of beauty can be deepened AND there are times where I feel like can’t access this beauty at all - and my quality of life with ‘the same life’ is experienced as a whole lot less enjoyable to say the least. So maybe I could say that there is a scale of openness to this beauty. And I might try to find words to share this. But 1) if people are just trying to understand this intellectually, it’ll make little sense 2) When not open to that beauty, then I can struggle to find words to describe it 3) When in that state of beauty, writing on Bluemoon isn’t álways’ my first choice of things to be doing so 4) I might borrow someone else’s words that aren’t exactly it but point in the same sort of direction. Added to that, people can be like ‘prove it or doesn’t exist’ and it can be a case of ’fuck knows if that’s even possible in the way people want but let’s write anyway.…’