Things your missus does that drive you to despair

[Magicpole]

You lucky bastard, I get the cotton buds, a full Nelson and a swift retort...."you're not going anywhere with me looking like that"

If I had a £ for every time I heard those words.

 

[goatersnipple]

Mine shouts down the phone if the signals bad.
It doesn't matter how much u shout woman.
The signals rubbish

 

[manchester blue]

Trimming my eyebrows if I get the odd straggler, she says that errant hair annoys her. She comes out of nowhere with the scissors.

It annoys me to be honest. I'm sat here with tweezers trying to get one from my ear that I can feel but not see.

Enjoy your dinner everyone!

 

[bluekat]

Yep. Then you spend half the meal craning your neck trying to get the waiters attention because you have your back to them.

 

[talkativesprout]

She takes offense to everything I say. I swear she adds the words "You woman" to everything I say in her head.

Me: I think this milk has gone sour

Her: I'm sorry I'm such a horrible wife but I didn't have time to go to the store today

I could put up with mine being a bit narky from time to time when i am having a bit of a whinge, but if she ever referred to the SHOP as a Store, i would kick the horrible woman in the Johnny Evans

 

[Stoned Rose]

Every day she comes in from work and tells me some bloke has just stuck his han

.....................Doesn't matter

Touche.

 

[vonkeynotvenky]

And not changing the batteries in the remote controls, just hits them against the palm of her hand and presses the buttons harder whilst pointing aggressively at the electrical item.

 

[Magicpole]

She never replaces the toilet roll, instead she just balances it on the holder. I have opened the door many times to see the new roll fly off and land in the bowl.

Happened again yesterday. Fucking drives me mental.

I brought it up last night. She responded by firing a tirade about my domestic shortcomings.

To be fair it was quite extensive, but that doesn't mean she isn't a **** too.

 

[its a Barm]

Its not what she does its what she doesn't that drives me to despair,she won't swallow.

 

[Tuearts right boot]

Its not what she does its what she doesn't that drives me to despair,she won't swallow.

What ever happened to Victorian values