Things your missus does that drive you to despair

Magicpole said:
My psoriasis flared up there after reading your plight and I don't even have it.

WTF!

And here's me thinking I have a nervous time ahead facing Bayern tonight.

Don't know I'm fucking born.

Thanks for putting shit into perspective. :)
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Just got through customs now. Plane should leave in 15 minutes. It's delayed by 15 minutes luckily.
The guy on check in - 40 minutes isn't long enough to check in your bags you should be here 3 hours before. Luckily your plane is delayed. I'll check them in this time.
Wife - Let's go eat
Me - Before going through customs?
Wife - Yes, we have loads of time
Me- Is there a chemist here I need to buy steroid cream.
 
shevtheblue said:
My boss is on the phone all day with his wife, i have no idea what they talk about. He'll get to the office, his work phone rings and its her, and from listening in i can just get that they're talking about how the kids were when he dropped them off at school and whether he's had his breakfast yet, or if he's had his morning shit and what the consistency of it was. Then she'll call again after lunch to tell him what she's been doing, or during lunch to tell him what she's eating. Then again a little later on, and so on. WTF do they talk about at home?
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If he doesn't own the business they may be talking about his next job.. He is doing fuck all in this role to warrant being kept on
 
shevtheblue said:
My boss is on the phone all day with his wife, i have no idea what they talk about. He'll get to the office, his work phone rings and its her, and from listening in i can just get that they're talking about how the kids were when he dropped them off at school and whether he's had his breakfast yet, or if he's had his morning shit and what the consistency of it was. Then she'll call again after lunch to tell him what she's been doing, or during lunch to tell him what she's eating. Then again a little later on, and so on. WTF do they talk about at home?
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Mate, if I allowed it that's what my GF would do with me.
They love waffling on. Least with emails at work I can reply in my own time. (which is usually once with me saying, 5 mins left now, see you at home)

Anyway, that's what my GF does that annoys me. She's ok apart from that.
 
Bluemanc100 said:
If he doesn't own the business they may be talking about his next job.. He is doing fuck all in this role to warrant being kept on
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No fucking chance, he's been here for 30 years and knows everyone. In fairness, he's actually a good guy but seems to have a weird relationship with his missue.
She's a contractor and got let go at her previous contract because she was on her phone all the time..they couldn't believe it!
 
GX Blue said:
Mate, if I allowed it that's what my GF would do with me.
They love waffling on. Least with emails at work I can reply in my own time. (which is usually once with me saying, 5 mins left now, see you at home)

Anyway, that's what my GF does that annoys me. She's ok apart from that.
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Ha ha SAME. 'Sent you a mail this morning, you never replied?'. Funnily enough, whether i like the white shabby sheek mirror or the metalic mirror for the lounge wasn't as important as the back to back meetings i had (NOTE: i didnt have any back to back meetings ;D)
 
GX Blue said:
They are all odd. Every single one of them.

My GF tends to say a lot to me. Especially when we've finished work. I'd like that to be quiet time but she doesn't. It doesn't matter if I'm watching TV or sat looking into space minding my own business, she always needs to talk to me about everything.

She then gets annoyed if I don't remember every detail or her chats. Like, I have to take her for an eye test tomorrow. I just txt her before, where is it at? She then replies, you know where its at I've told you 3 times this week.

I don't think she has.

I've explained we need to work on her chats with quality over quantity.
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I absolutely fucking hate that need to talk about everything.
 
My Mrs always has the door to the living room wedged open with one of those cheap plastic wedges, don't know why but it's fucking mandatory
Sunday morning i'm lay in bed nurshing an after match hangover when she bursts into bedroom demanding to know where the plastic door wedge is, how the fuck do i know i never touch it i reply
You've hid it haven't you when you came in last night and i was in bed she shouts, we then search everywhere for it with her getting more and more agitated while i just take the piss, it's nowhere in sight, chaos ensues with me dispatched off to the Pound Shop to buy another, disaster, they've sold out so a cushion is used to keep door open and her cursing me from Sunday until this afternoon when she found it in the capacious bag she lugs about everywhere
Of course i get the blame, i obviously put it there to wind her up, IT'S A WEDGE i snap back now fuck off
My 2 year old Grandaughter put it in there, do i get an apology, do i fuck, women, pain in the arse
 
Tuearts right boot said:
You know your problem.....you just dont listen to a single fucking word she's saying.
A swift retort of ' well if you had something worth listening too, I'd listen' usually does the trick.
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One of the above posts nailed it for me mate. Quality over quantity. Give me 100 words of substance over 1000 words of gapfiller any day. Said without any irony as I post on an internet forum ;)

Another thing that gets me is the deep analysis of anything that is said. My missus is continually in a state of cold war with her sister, both of them have a weekly freak out over alternative meanings of what they have texted each other.
 
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