United Thread 2015/16

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Woody does not know what day it is, he's being sent on that many fruitless missions across different time zones on a wild goose chase. What the fuck and who the fuck and where the fuck is it which team our next target is playing for and he gives it the yadayada shit about United being a big club? Is that the Man U's plan? Looks like it. The hilarity continues.

Got a feeling that he is one of those people who makes a complete cock up of things so the swampdwellers have come up with this strategy to just keep him on the move.

"Ed, your off to Barcelona"

"But I've only just got back from Madrid"
 
Neymar hahahaha they fuck Barcelona about for Pedro then expect Neymar?

The Sun will sell loads off papers to gullible rags this morning.

Oh my insides :-)
Not that I feel sorry for the rag hordes but this is mental torture being inflicted on them by that odious club, they are having their hopes built up again that a world superstar like Neymar is actually going to leave arguably the best team in the world and pitch up on the side of the Ship Canal to fight for a Europa League place, if that;s what they want to believe then they are thicker than I ever imagined
 
Neymar hahahaha they fuck Barcelona about for Pedro then expect Neymar?

The Sun will sell loads off papers to gullible rags this morning.

Oh my insides :-)

Do you recon they might have a watershed moment and stop buying the sun, the mirror etc due to having their hopes dashed by these bull shit transfer stories. Barca know they ain't selling Neymar, United know barca won't sell Neymar so why run big on a story a move is going to happen?
 
Secret talks for Neymar eh....? That Woodward fella is a bit of genius in keeping that under the radar. I never knew Barca were selling Neymar. Ah well, you live and learn........
 
Will Neymar be making his debut today after progressing through the yoonitey academy? Yippeekayhay
 
Naymar and Pedro upfront with Ronaldo and bale.
Bloody hell they're building some team.....

Oh hang .....
 
Not exactly secret talks if its in the papers is it. But Naymar LOL. As if Barcelona are going to sell him. Just keeping the fans happy I guess by being linked to a player of the week.
From Gossip page also on BBC they say "Manchester United are demanding that Real Madrid pay £29m for Spanish goalkeeper David De Gea, 24 - or £22m plus 28-year-old Costa Rican Keylor Navas". Demanding lol. Madrid will just say keep him for a year and we will have him for nothing.
So Turtleneck is saying he is not for sale and wont be sold yet wont pick him till after the transfer window shuts. Weird.
 
It's great watching Oil Rig Head squirm, it's a win win situation for Real with De Gea.

The desperation out of the Toilet at the minute is hilarious, Woodward and louis are about as much use as a dwarf buying a season ticket for Aston Towers..
 
It's great watching Oil Rig Head squirm, it's a win win situation for Real with De Gea.

The desperation out of the Toilet at the minute is hilarious, Woodward and louis are about as much use as a dwarf buying a season ticket for Aston Towers..

Christ it's 8 in the morning and the best post of the day has happened. Trying not to laugh as I don't want to wake the Mrs, but the dwarf analogy was hilarious.
 
It's great watching Oil Rig Head squirm, it's a win win situation for Real with De Gea.

The desperation out of the Toilet at the minute is hilarious, Woodward and louis are about as much use as a dwarf buying a season ticket for Aston Towers..

"Oil Rig Head"
Love it [emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38]
 
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Yes yes i totally agree ,that bloody rooney i mean ramos pulling stunts like that
 
Bless em, they still believe

"I still have faith in Griezmann or Muller being signed on Deadline Day with a fee that will shock the footballing world.
I reckon we're one signing away from the title. A big name forward player will give us that massive push"
 
Do you recon they might have a watershed moment and stop buying the sun, the mirror etc due to having their hopes dashed by these bull shit transfer stories. Barca know they ain't selling Neymar, United know barca won't sell Neymar so why run big on a story a move is going to happen?

Did you see those empty seats the other night :-) they have to do something:-)
 
Bless em, they still believe

"I still have faith in Griezmann or Muller being signed on Deadline Day with a fee that will shock the footballing world.
I reckon we're one signing away from the title. A big name forward player will give us that massive push"

If your hoping for Muller and Griezmann on transfer day, why not go the whole hog and hold out for world peace and an end to hunger. There is more chance of the latter happening.

Why aren't the natives getting restless over there? They seem to be sleep walking into mediocrity and there doesn't seem to be the decision making from the board or on the footballing side of it to recruit and take the club forward.

I wouldn't be happy if we had signed the players they have. Memphis will probably end up on loan in Turkey in a couple of seasons once they realise he ain't the second coming of Ronaldo.

How long can they put up with Van Gaal's comedy press conferences before he really snaps and the media sharpen their knifes for him?

Having players within your club telling Pedro not to come is stunningly embarrassing and all the while holding De Gea against his own will so he can leave for nothing next year as a piss poor way of playing hard ball.

Stoichkov, Soriano, Demichielis and Valdez can't all be wrong about turtle head. This guy is the big reason players don't want to be there and look else where when Eddie jumps off a plane desperately trying to wave a contract in their faces.

He will play the bog brush this weekend and return to last seasons hoof ball tactics, they will get more joy doing it that way rather than trying to play football. They will soon get figured out though.

Who's having he won't be there by the end of the season? It will be disappointing for us for sheer comedy value and they might get lucky on the management recruitment next time?
 
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Bless em, they still believe

"I still have faith in Griezmann or Muller being signed on Deadline Day with a fee that will shock the footballing world.
I reckon we're one signing away from the title. A big name forward player will give us that massive push"
" massive" :-)
 
I just think it was really nice that Ed Woodward went all the way over to Barcelona, in person, to tell Pedro the rags didn't want him. That shows real class. Even the deluded hordes on the caff aren't buying the Neymar story. I think the Sun must have misheard Turtlehead when he said about buying no-marks.
 
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