BimboBob
Well-Known Member
What a nice MOD you are.
Picture the scene. I am in America. Pennsylvania to be precise. A quaint little Amish village called Intercourse. There is a Amish country shop complex that sells all manner of home made junk that my wife and my mates wife and two young girls like. By a stroke of luck we are staying on the complex above one of the shops. A lovely room with a massive en-suite. To get to this room you need to go through the shop and up the stairs.
We had been wandering around for a while and sat down to eat. Everything was rosy except as it's Amish land you can't buy beer. One of my mates little girls didn't fancy her burger as it 'looked funny' and me being a greedy git wolfed it down.
We carried on browsing, my wife loving the Christmas shop. I sat outside and smoked. Weirdly,even though it was 90 odd degrees i started to feel cold. Then i started to sweat. Then my stomach started to quiver. I knew what would happen next.
Assessing the situation i decided not to head for the public toilets 20 yards away but saunter to our room 300 yards away. So i sauntered. My stomach flipped again. I sauntered a bit quicker. Then i started to saunter real fast. Some might say it was a sprint. As i reached the shop doorway i felt a warm feeling down the back of my legs. That were bare due to me wearing shorts.
I ran into the shop only to be stopped by the lovely old lady who ran it. She asked how i was and if the room was ok. I stood there for around 5 seconds before feeling even more warmth down the back of my legs. I ran for the door. I ran up the stairs. I ran into our room. I ran into the bathroom.
That's as far as i got as everything exploded. It was everywhere. Stupidly i chucked my clothes from the floor, which now resembled a forest floor after a rainstorm into the bath. I sat on the loo.
45 minutes later i had cleaned up everything. 20 minutes later i had cleaned the towels and my clothing.
As i made my way out of the room i noticed a brown stain on the stairs. It was also in the shop. A large stain that the nice old lady was scrubbing. I made my way outside and on the steps was another. In fact the weird stain appeared right up until the edge of the shops.
My wife asked if i was ok. My mates also. The little bastards asked why i had changed my clothes and appeared sweaty.
Bloody burger.
Picture the scene. I am in America. Pennsylvania to be precise. A quaint little Amish village called Intercourse. There is a Amish country shop complex that sells all manner of home made junk that my wife and my mates wife and two young girls like. By a stroke of luck we are staying on the complex above one of the shops. A lovely room with a massive en-suite. To get to this room you need to go through the shop and up the stairs.
We had been wandering around for a while and sat down to eat. Everything was rosy except as it's Amish land you can't buy beer. One of my mates little girls didn't fancy her burger as it 'looked funny' and me being a greedy git wolfed it down.
We carried on browsing, my wife loving the Christmas shop. I sat outside and smoked. Weirdly,even though it was 90 odd degrees i started to feel cold. Then i started to sweat. Then my stomach started to quiver. I knew what would happen next.
Assessing the situation i decided not to head for the public toilets 20 yards away but saunter to our room 300 yards away. So i sauntered. My stomach flipped again. I sauntered a bit quicker. Then i started to saunter real fast. Some might say it was a sprint. As i reached the shop doorway i felt a warm feeling down the back of my legs. That were bare due to me wearing shorts.
I ran into the shop only to be stopped by the lovely old lady who ran it. She asked how i was and if the room was ok. I stood there for around 5 seconds before feeling even more warmth down the back of my legs. I ran for the door. I ran up the stairs. I ran into our room. I ran into the bathroom.
That's as far as i got as everything exploded. It was everywhere. Stupidly i chucked my clothes from the floor, which now resembled a forest floor after a rainstorm into the bath. I sat on the loo.
45 minutes later i had cleaned up everything. 20 minutes later i had cleaned the towels and my clothing.
As i made my way out of the room i noticed a brown stain on the stairs. It was also in the shop. A large stain that the nice old lady was scrubbing. I made my way outside and on the steps was another. In fact the weird stain appeared right up until the edge of the shops.
My wife asked if i was ok. My mates also. The little bastards asked why i had changed my clothes and appeared sweaty.
Bloody burger.