Does death scare you?

BimboBob said:
I always thought that I wasn't scared of death/ dying. And then I got terminal cancer.

It's now very much in my thoughts. Usually when I'm walking the dog. I find myself making mental lists of things I still need to sort out. This also happens just before I doze off at night.

But am I scared?

Not really.

It's coming to everyone, it's just a tad quicker than I expected. I'm also fighting the shit out of it, with the help of immunotherapy. By rights I'm 6 months into time I didn't have.

So scared? Nope. Pissed off? Oh yes.
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I’ve known a few people like that Bob, my step dad especially, for as long as I remember, his attitude was ‘so what’ and actually used to say when he goes, just dump his body because he’s no longer there , hire a ‘Ragtime Band’ , have a party and dance in the streets.

I honestly believe he genuinely meant that, yet when it came very very close once (so close that I visited early one morning, the staff actually said they thought he’d ‘gone’ moments before, so were relieved when I got a response from him), upon realising how close he was, his attitude completely changed and was petrified, has been ever since.

Hope you’re doing ok anyway mate, always enjoy your posts (apart from the obvious) and always thought we had a very similar sense of humour, someone I’d make an exception of getting rat arsed with and getting into all sorts of mischief.
 
I'm 70, generally had a nice life, happily married for 43 years, three great lads who I am very proud off, been following City since 1961, lived through some great era's of music, Beatles/Zeppelin etc, but obviously the clock is winding down, even though I am in good health, so no, death does not scare me, and I don't subscribe to this guff about the afterlife, i'll just be a pile of ashes I want throwing over Ribblehead Viaduct on The Settle-Carlisle line.

I've had some good mates, (including Bill Walker in Oz) on here, so overall can't complain.
 
kenbelly said:
I’m getting rid of everything I own so somebody else doesn’t have to deal with the shit when I’ve gone. It feels good to get rid of everything, very liberating, makes me wonder why i bothered buying stuff, maybe for a future I don’t now have. Cancer will kill me at some point so I’m fine with the idea of death, I’ll just enjoy being alive whilst I’m here, live life to the full in between chemo, travel loads…and then fuck off.
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So what your really saying is that you have a load of kinky sex stuff that you need rid of before your next of kin finds out how colourful you really were. Good planning.
 
Death itself doesn't scare me, but I still do have the occasional panic over the fact I won't see my loved ones again when it happens. I don't believe in an afterlife but it really does upset me the fact that we'll not be together forever. When my Mum was dying she had little moments of fear which was heartbreaking, but was largely just terrified of it being painful. She went through a hell of a lot of pain and a real loss of dignity as she had bowel cancer, it was nothing like Deborah James where she could go out and about and attend events, it was a much more horrific affair than that throughout the final months. But in the end she went during the night and without too much discomfort which I was happy about, even though I miss her.

I hold out hope that perhaps I'll meet her again one day.
 
kenbelly said:
I’m getting rid of everything I own so somebody else doesn’t have to deal with the shit when I’ve gone. It feels good to get rid of everything, very liberating, makes me wonder why i bothered buying stuff, maybe for a future I don’t now have. Cancer will kill me at some point so I’m fine with the idea of death, I’ll just enjoy being alive whilst I’m here, live life to the full in between chemo, travel loads…and then fuck off.
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This is a good plan. When my father in law passed away. It took 13 skips to clear out his house. I was up in the loft on my own, clearing out old boxes of crap, pot and pans, fighting through spiderwebs, all the rusty out toolkits, cans of rusty nails.

And he didn't have a will, so she had to go through probate for 12 months, before we could sell his gaff. And pay off his credit card debts..

It was an avoidable load of stress.
 
Not being ever able to see trees, the countryside, the wonderful array of animals we have on the earth, the sea, the joy of hurtling downhill on my bike, my beautiful daughters in old age, the tastes and smells of freshly cooked food and the views from a just-climbed peak. These are some of the simple things in life and they’re really all I need. I’ve been lucky enough to enjoy them all and when my time comes it is going to piss me off that they’re not going to be available for me any more. That’s it really - not a fear just a feeling of sadness.
 
When you are a child and you get an understanding of mortality and that you will die that is when it’s scary. It used to scare the shit out of me knowing that me and everyone I cared about will die.

Think as you get older there is more of an acceptance that it will happen and you make your peace with it. No one lives for ever so make it count whilst you are here.
 
bluethrunthru said:
no - its inevitable. I hope not to die in a drawn out excruciating pain kind of way but at the same time just dropping down dead will shock the family but with experience of losing people the drawn out version where the dying can say goodbye is better than dropping dead
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I don’t know.
I’ve seen both with my mother getting progressively worse for years with emphysema and my father having a massive heart attack out of the blue.

Initially, my finding my father in a chair at home when I got in from work was worse, but I think in the end after the initial shock, you realise it is a much better way to go.
 
TonyM said:
So what your really saying is that you have a load of kinky sex stuff that you need rid of before your next of kin finds out how colourful you really were. Good planning.
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TonyM said:
So what your really saying is that you have a load of kinky sex stuff that you need rid of before your next of kin finds out how colourful you really were. Good planning.
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Yes mate haha
 
Missing out on future events scare me. I want to see us land on Mars and further.
And the Rags and dippers getting relegated.
 
After spending 18 months watching my wife of 25 years slowly succumb to a Brain tumour I feel insulated from any concerns.I have come out the other end more resilient but with permanent if fluctuating degrees of anxiety not related to death.
My parents are 84 and 79 respectively and I am grateful they’ve had long lives.
When life is precious I do wonder why so many people get irate over comparably menial events.
 
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