Does death scare you?

I always thought that I wasn't scared of death/ dying. And then I got terminal cancer.

It's now very much in my thoughts. Usually when I'm walking the dog. I find myself making mental lists of things I still need to sort out. This also happens just before I doze off at night.

But am I scared?

Not really.

It's coming to everyone, it's just a tad quicker than I expected. I'm also fighting the shit out of it, with the help of immunotherapy. By rights I'm 6 months into time I didn't have.

So scared? Nope. Pissed off? Oh yes.
I’ve known a few people like that Bob, my step dad especially, for as long as I remember, his attitude was ‘so what’ and actually used to say when he goes, just dump his body because he’s no longer there , hire a ‘Ragtime Band’ , have a party and dance in the streets.

I honestly believe he genuinely meant that, yet when it came very very close once (so close that I visited early one morning, the staff actually said they thought he’d ‘gone’ moments before, so were relieved when I got a response from him), upon realising how close he was, his attitude completely changed and was petrified, has been ever since.

Hope you’re doing ok anyway mate, always enjoy your posts (apart from the obvious) and always thought we had a very similar sense of humour, someone I’d make an exception of getting rat arsed with and getting into all sorts of mischief.
 
I'm 70, generally had a nice life, happily married for 43 years, three great lads who I am very proud off, been following City since 1961, lived through some great era's of music, Beatles/Zeppelin etc, but obviously the clock is winding down, even though I am in good health, so no, death does not scare me, and I don't subscribe to this guff about the afterlife, i'll just be a pile of ashes I want throwing over Ribblehead Viaduct on The Settle-Carlisle line.

I've had some good mates, (including Bill Walker in Oz) on here, so overall can't complain.
 
I’m getting rid of everything I own so somebody else doesn’t have to deal with the shit when I’ve gone. It feels good to get rid of everything, very liberating, makes me wonder why i bothered buying stuff, maybe for a future I don’t now have. Cancer will kill me at some point so I’m fine with the idea of death, I’ll just enjoy being alive whilst I’m here, live life to the full in between chemo, travel loads…and then fuck off.
So what your really saying is that you have a load of kinky sex stuff that you need rid of before your next of kin finds out how colourful you really were. Good planning.
 
Death itself doesn't scare me, but I still do have the occasional panic over the fact I won't see my loved ones again when it happens. I don't believe in an afterlife but it really does upset me the fact that we'll not be together forever. When my Mum was dying she had little moments of fear which was heartbreaking, but was largely just terrified of it being painful. She went through a hell of a lot of pain and a real loss of dignity as she had bowel cancer, it was nothing like Deborah James where she could go out and about and attend events, it was a much more horrific affair than that throughout the final months. But in the end she went during the night and without too much discomfort which I was happy about, even though I miss her.

I hold out hope that perhaps I'll meet her again one day.
 
I’m getting rid of everything I own so somebody else doesn’t have to deal with the shit when I’ve gone. It feels good to get rid of everything, very liberating, makes me wonder why i bothered buying stuff, maybe for a future I don’t now have. Cancer will kill me at some point so I’m fine with the idea of death, I’ll just enjoy being alive whilst I’m here, live life to the full in between chemo, travel loads…and then fuck off.
This is a good plan. When my father in law passed away. It took 13 skips to clear out his house. I was up in the loft on my own, clearing out old boxes of crap, pot and pans, fighting through spiderwebs, all the rusty out toolkits, cans of rusty nails.

And he didn't have a will, so she had to go through probate for 12 months, before we could sell his gaff. And pay off his credit card debts..

It was an avoidable load of stress.
 

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