PL charge City for alleged breaches of financial rules

pepguardiola'smoustache said:
An accountant's opinion is not always fully trustworthy, though.

A lawyer, an accountant and a mathematician are on a train that has just gone over the border into scotland. when they see a brown cow in a field ...

Lawyer: Look, the cows in scotland are brown.

Accountant: Incorrect, all you can say with any certainty is one cow in scotland is brown.

Mathematician: You are both incorrect, all we can logically state is that in scotland there is at least one cow, one side of which appears to be brown.
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Yay for mathematicians
 
halfcenturyup said:
I was talking about their opinions on the law and on legal process to which we should always listen. But I can't think of one who has stated an outcome to this case with any certainty. I wouldn't expect any different, though, - lawyers seldom give a definitive answer on outcomes for the reason you stated.

Oh, and accountancy is much more than maths but I won't take it personally :)
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I can vouch for that. I did an accountancy year (CIMA) in the 80s as someone with a Maths background and it was broken into 4 sections quantitative maths, accounting, business law and um something else. I was surprised by the amount of non maths involved. It was never intended to take it further it was just a fallback plan in case. quite enjoyed it to be honest.
 
pepguardiola'smoustache said:
An accountant's opinion is not always fully trustworthy, though.

A lawyer, an accountant and a mathematician are on a train that has just gone over the border into scotland. when they see a brown cow in a field ...

Lawyer: Look, the cows in scotland are brown.

Accountant: Incorrect, all you can say with any certainty is one cow in scotland is brown.

Mathematician: You are both incorrect, all we can logically state is that in scotland there is at least one cow, one side of which appears to be brown.
Click to expand...
How big was it?

father-ted-cows.gif
 
pepguardiola'smoustache said:
An accountant's opinion is not always fully trustworthy, though.

A lawyer, an accountant and a mathematician are on a train that has just gone over the border into scotland. when they see a brown cow in a field ...

Lawyer: Look, the cows in scotland are brown.

Accountant: Incorrect, all you can say with any certainty is one cow in scotland is brown.

Mathematician: You are both incorrect, all we can logically state is that in scotland there is at least one cow, one side of which appears to be brown.
Click to expand...
I would just like to add to this to say that i am supposedly a mathematician (by degree or possibly decree as it was a long time ago) and i would only say the above in my head and not out loud so as to reduce the chances of ridicule.
 
pepguardiola'smoustache said:
An accountant's opinion is not always fully trustworthy, though.

A lawyer, an accountant and a mathematician are on a train that has just gone over the border into scotland. when they see a brown cow in a field ...

Lawyer: Look, the cows in scotland are brown.

Accountant: Incorrect, all you can say with any certainty is one cow in scotland is brown.

Mathematician: You are both incorrect, all we can logically state is that in scotland there is at least one cow, one side of which appears to be brown.
Click to expand...
As if a lawyer would offer his opinion on anything without being paid for it.
 
Lord Blue said:
I would just like to add to this to say that i am supposedly a mathematician (by degree or possibly decree as it was a long time ago) and i would only say the above in my head and not out loud so as to reduce the chances of ridicule.
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Yes, but you are not in a joke on a train that has just entered scotland, are you, so the situation wouldn't have arisen, although, theoretically, if we actually live in infinite universes and the situation did arise within one of those, then you would likely have had your head in a maths book, merely overhearing the statements of the other two and so you could've easily said it out loud without the need to lift your head and observe said cow, thus removing the chance of ridicule because in your head the cow might not even exist.
 
pepguardiola'smoustache said:
Yes, but you are not in a joke on a train that has just entered scotland, are you, so the situation wouldn't have arisen, although, theoretically, if we actually live in infinite universes and the situation did arise within one of those, then you would likely have had your head in a maths book, merely overhearing the statements of the other two and so you could've easily said it out loud without the need to lift your head and observe said cow, thus removing the chance of ridicule because in your head the cow might not even exist.
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i don't think you understand mathematicians. as we are inherently lazy and would not have our heads in maths book unless we had to. i chose maths as there is comparatively little reading and writing involved. maths is instinctive. sounds odd but if your head is wired a certain way then it's easy otherwise its hard.

if i was on a train to scotland i would probably be drinking and be seeing 2 cows, which is ironic for a mathematician.

if i was to say that out loud it might well lead to ridicule too. in my life i have found that most times i open my mouth it leads to ridicule.
 
Lord Blue said:
i don't think you understand mathematicians. as we are inherently lazy and would not have our heads in maths book unless we had to. i chose maths as there is comparatively little reading and writing involved. maths is instinctive. sounds odd but if your head is wired a certain way then it's easy otherwise its hard.

if i was on a train to scotland i would probably be drinking and be seeing 2 cows, which is ironic for a mathematician.

if i was to say that out loud it might well lead to ridicule too. in my life i have found that most times i open my mouth it leads to ridicule.
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At the age of 14 i was already having to study Alevel maths at nightschool because i was above+beyond very accomplished at it, so i do have some understanding of mathematicians and may well have gone on to forge a career out of it had i not discovered girls and (as you say) alcohol in excessive quantities, which steered me in the direction of archeology and foreign digs, where both could easily be found, although i've no idea what that has to do with scotch cows or 115.
 
M18CTID said:
I’m sure it’s also got nothing to do with the fact that City have won the league title 5 times on the last day of the season over the past 13 years, all at the expense of red shirt cartel **** clubs, whereas the last time Chelsea won a league title on the last day of the season at the expense of a red shirt cartel **** club was 15 years ago. That’s ancient history to many. Fact is that these fuckers see us as a far bigger threat to their warped view that they have a divine right to win trophies than Chelsea are.
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Also on a few of those last day title wins we teased them into thinking we might lose. Just to rub their noses in it a little bit more.
 
Lord Blue said:
i don't think you understand mathematicians. as we are inherently lazy and would not have our heads in maths book unless we had to. i chose maths as there is comparatively little reading and writing involved. maths is instinctive. sounds odd but if your head is wired a certain way then it's easy otherwise its hard.

if i was on a train to scotland i would probably be drinking and be seeing 2 cows, which is ironic for a mathematician.

if i was to say that out loud it might well lead to ridicule too. in my life i have found that most times i open my mouth it leads to ridicule.
Click to expand...
An Ofsted Inspector, (as per) trying to be a smart ****, asked a kid in a rural school: “How many cows can you see?”
“All of them.”
Apocryphal, possibly. But nice to think of the **** inspector being put in his place.
 
KS55 said:
The Marketing man said: “You are all pissed. That is an elephant.”
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johnnytapia said:
The marketing man said, “We’re wasting half our revenue on marketing. We just don’t know which half.”
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The theoretical physicist said, "There's no observable marketing man in this joke so it is best to ignore him and besides which, if there were someone from marketing it would be sexist to assume they were a man".
 
halfcenturyup said:
I was talking about their opinions on the law and on legal process to which we should always listen. But I can't think of one who has stated an outcome to this case with any certainty. I wouldn't expect any different, though, - lawyers seldom give a definitive answer on outcomes for the reason you stated.

Oh, and accountancy is much more than maths but I won't take it personally :)
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Not sure I meant or even said exclusively maths but it certainly manipulates reports into p and l format that allows the rest of us to see whether or not we are making money.

I may have said to you previously that if a business is going to be judged by accountants it would be wise to start thinking like an accountant which infers learning how the value of business products balance against their total cost over a period of time.
 
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