Favourite lines from Viz

'Piss up a rope fuckstick'

Possibly the finest expletive ever. It was either rude kid or rude parrot - can't remember which.
 
From memory, a star letter off the letters page....

My granddad was the best drummer in the world. He used to practice 18 hours a day, seven days a week, every day of the year.
Morning, noon, and night he'd be banging away with his sticks, so dedicated he was, he didn't even have a set of drums, preferring instead to play on old biscuit tins, bottles, anything he could lay his hands on.
He was still playing right up till the moment he died aged 86 when my grandmother stabbed him in the neck with a fork.
 
Whilst driving along the other day I thought I saw Irish Pop legend Van Morrison in my rear view mirror. What a fool I felt when I remembered that things appear reversed in mirrors. It was actually a Morrisons van.
 
Helmet Cole said:
'Piss up a rope fuckstick'

Possibly the finest expletive ever. It was either rude kid or rude parrot - can't remember which.
Click to expand...

It was Rude Kid:

tumblr_md7sgc7t2A1rzmyd7o1_1280.jpg


I think you may be confusing him with 'Bertie Blunt - His Parrot's a C**t'.

Edit - I tried to add a link, but the swear-filter doesn't like a particular word in the URL. If you Google it, the full strip is on the Viz archive.
 
The one scene Victor Mature gags were always my Fave....

"Do you fancy getting pissed Vic?"

"No I don't think so"

Simple but genius lol
 
I've had a shit day at work and theres another Viz topic on bluemoon, thanks guys just stopped laughing.

There is a pic of the nut clad cleaner on the thread from a few years ago.
 
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