Funniest thing you have heard at a match

Someone at the match today when Terry got booked said "one more yellow card and he's off". To which my dad replied "bloody hell, he knows his football that lad". Made me laugh anyway. Stating the obvious at it's best.
 
Think it was this season can't remember which game when city fans were singing "whos that faggot in the pink" only for said fan to put on a black top...to which he got "whos that faggot in the black". Went on for a while and tickled me slightly.
 
Beard said:
Think it was this season can't remember which game when city fans were singing "whos that faggot in the pink" only for said fan to put on a black top...to which he got "whos that faggot in the black". Went on for a while and tickled me slightly.
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Was against Fulham in the league, the 2-2 match.
 
couple of things have made me chuckle at city games,

best one, derby at home last season. the ball went into the north stand and it was united's corner. wayne rooney was stood at the corner flag with his hands out for the ball. the fan who had it started chanting YOU FAT BASTARD! to rooney. then all the north stand started joining in. brilliant.


Also some guy infront of me at the same match, really had tourettes that match. patrice evra was infront of us and this guy just stood up and shouted PATRICE EVRA YOU FRENCH T**T! OUT OF THE BLUE.


Think bolton game last season, some guy was really drunk sat couple of rows infront of me and my son. we were in colin bell level one. he was singing on his own for like twenty minutes no one joined in with him. then he turned around and showed his love and emotion for the club. he shouted at the whole colin bell stand (COME ON WHERE'S YOUR PASSION, YOU KNOW THIS COULD BE THE NEW KIPPAX STAND IF YOU LET IT, YOUR ALL TO BORING) he was really drunk but very funny.
 
A few years ago when Bellers played for Newcastle

Guy a few rows in front of us whilst Bellamy was taking a throw:

"BBBBEEEEEELLLLLLLLAAAAAAMMMMMMMYYYYY

Your a hunchback!!! Your shirts been specially made!!!"

Bellamy then turned to him and stared, prompting him and about 5000+ to join in a chorus os:

"Ding Dong ding dong, Ding Dong ding dong"
Hunchback of notre damn if no-one's seen it.

Or you're too fat to referee at anfield to Wiley (ironic)
 
CaptainCrapTash said:
This one was at Oldham v Port Vale and they were losing 1-0 with about 2 minutes left

Anyway this poor young ball boy was sat there, the keeper was wasting time and not retrieveing the ball.

So the Oldham Fans start giving this kid shit loads of abuse. (mind you he wasn't the thinnest kid in the world)

Just calling him a fat ****, a prick fatty the usual. So finally when the ball got retrieved chants of "you fat bastard" echoed the chaddy end.

The poor lad was in tears haha
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TBH Thats not funny, Iv been ball boy at Leeds and if the Kop started singing that to me, (Im not fat, not one bit) I would be gutted, and really upset, and my hatred for Leeds would be even greater!!

(I have ballboyed in front of the kop, the atmosphere is embarrassing there, to say its the equivalent of our SS and 111)
 
At the Burnley game the fella behind me shouts '' cant beleive ive sat here and watched this shit and now I have to go home and watch those two Jedward cnuts'' pissed myself
 
When we played Blackburn in Div 1 we were top of the league we won 2-0 and I always remember this nutter who had a cap and cut the peak off it because it had kappa on and we were sponsered by le coq at that time, he stood up on his own and shouted at the top of his voice "I LIKE SPAM" always sticks in my head proper nutcase.
 
Grand Master Ram Rod said:
Someone at the match today when Terry got booked said "one more yellow card and he's off". To which my dad replied "bloody hell, he knows his football that lad". Made me laugh anyway. Stating the obvious at it's best.
Click to expand...

blackburn away this season
winning 0-1

guy next to me says "if we keep a cleansheet now, i think we will win"

just nodded and agreed
 
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