There's a simple answer to how Cook can redeem himself.
Firstly, he's got to run through a Tunnel of Death the length of the pitch at Eastlands ahead of the Arsenal game on Wednesday. All of those OUTRAGED by his slip can take part in exchange for a small donation. Kicks, knees and punches of all kinds are allowed, but no weapons.
On completing the Tunnel of Death, Cook will then have to drink 33 pints of Singha Beer, one for every year we've gone without a pot (also his fault). There shall be no cheating and getting the pipes cleaned, he must drink the same stale, watered-down rat piss we all have to.
Things won't stop there. To prove his allegencies to the non-evil side of Manchester, Gary will be given the customary (usually done when pissed up in Benidorm) bad City tattoo, old badge or new, his call. Even the slightest whimper will mean him losing his job.
Lastly, just so he knows that he's let himself down, he'll have to go at Jackie Tits Out for three minutes solid whilst dressed in nothing but a sky blue mankini in the centre circle.
Only when Gary completes these challenges will we stop all these stupid monging and admit that he's doing a ruddy good job and just dropped a bit of a bollock.
