Joke thread

[Lavinda Past]

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[Bill Walker]

 

[Bill Walker]

 

[Bill Walker]

 

[blue44]

 

[Tuearts right boot]

I wax walking my dog down the canal yesterday, he suddenly jumped his lead and dived into the water, I knew, like me, he couldn’t swim. I was absolutely distraught and had no idea what to do.

From nowhere this Asian chap appeared, stripped off his clothes, dived into the canal, picked up my drowning dog, got him out of the water then resuscitated him. My dog barked to show he was back to life, I was in awe.

I said to the Asian guy “thank you so much much, are you a Vet?”

He said “Vet, I’m fucking soaking”.

Reminds of the one when 2 strangers get talking in the pub about sport. After a few minutes one says to the other
" Are you a pole vaulter "
" Jah, but how did you know my name ...?"

 

[hammocity]

Reminds of the one when 2 strangers get talking in the pub about sport. After a few minutes one says to the other
" Are you a pole vaulter "
" Jah, but how did you know my name ...?"

My Polish mate Darius came out with “I used to be a Legia Warsaw fan until we moved to a new ground, everywhere you sat was an obstructed view, behind a pole”.

None of us laughed at that one.

 

[snorky]

My Polish mate Darius came out with “I used to be a Legia Warsaw fan until we moved to a new ground, everywhere you sat was an obstructed view, behind a pole”.

None of us laughed at that one.

Darius should have had his bike nearby.

 

[Blue Mist]

So much for Dry January. I've just got piss wet through walking to the pub.

 

[dobingsdobber]

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Fascinating mate,still prefer a kebab though.