Joke thread

[BlueMojito]

What's the difference between a penis and a bonus?

Your wife will always blow your bonus.


Why do farts smell?

For benefit of the deaf.

 

[jimharri]

My girlfriend said if I don’t do page 7 of the Kama sutra she will leave me.

It's put me in a very difficult position.

 

[Deleted member 13905]

My girlfriend said if I don’t do page 7 of the Kama sutra she will leave me.

It's put me in a very difficult position.

ahem!
(they are your rules after all, are they not?)

 

[jimharri]

ahem!
(they are your rules after all, are they not?)

They're the unwritten, but understood, rules of the forum. Not mine. And as for your request, imagine a hybrid of Kate Upton, Holly Willoughby and Charlize Theron. Well, she's nothing like that!

 

[Deleted member 13905]

They're the unwritten, but understood, rules of the forum. Not mine.

like the man with the orthopædic shoe, i stand corrected.

 

[brass neck]

Three rules to live by in life.

1. Never eat yellow snow
2. Never bend down in a revolving door
3. Never take a laxative and a sleeping tablet together.

 

[LWashington]

My girlfriend said if I don’t do page 7 of the Kama sutra she will leave me.

It's put me in a very difficult position.

And I thought you'd bend over backwards for her.

 

[Grassland Blue]

As a boy , the composer Bach was in the music room practising one day when he decided to climb into the grand piano.
His nanny, realising the music had stopped went to see what was wrong.
After a short while she found Bach and said, "Sebastian - what are you doing in there? "
"Sshh, I'm Haydn!" came the reply....

 

[Squelch]

My obsession with the Chuckle brothers is getting out of hand, i've just changed my name from Tommy to Hugh.

 

[taleofbluehalves]

Just called the Sea Life Centre for some tickets.

They said my call would be recorded for training porpoises.