Joke thread

[Fred_Quimby]

Had us howling last night.

Wonderful. That wins this years prize. No need to post anything else.

 

[Mancity1980]

Two nuns were sat in a car when a group of youths started laughing and throwing stones st their vehicle. Sister Mary turns to sister Teresa and says “this is disgraceful, do these young people not realised we are nuns? Show them your cross.” So sister Teresa sticks her head out of the window and shouts “Fu@k off you b@stards!!”

 

[BackofJeanette]

Gonna spoil it by explaining this alleged joke:

Basically, the husband has tricked his wife by putting numbers in his phone to catch her out and cover his back. So she would phone all the suspicious-looking ones but wouldn't suspect the car garage number that is really his bit on the side.

Feel free to laugh now.

I don't think it's really a joke, just more like common sense to me.
Like, always buy your wife the same perfume you buy your mistress!

 

[manclad]

I don't think it's really a joke, just more like common sense to me.
Like, always buy your wife the same perfume you buy your mistress!

What's a mistress?

Somebody who comes between a mister and a mattress !!

 

[Blue Mist]

I don't think it's really a joke, just more like common sense to me.
Like, always buy your wife the same perfume you buy your mistress!

I tried following that advice but had to ask my missus what perfume she wore, I asked if she was wearing that new fragrance cumtome. She said no so I said well it smells like cum to me.

 

[adelaideblue]

did you hear about the chameleon that didn't change colour - it had a reptile dysfunction..

 

[ChicagoBlue]

Donald Trump.

 

[ChicagoBlue]

Had us howling last night.

I’m long past the age where I literally blurt out laughing, so THANK YOU! I can still do it!

 

[ChicagoBlue]

Think its all of us

A) It doesn’t help that it is what looks like a Chinese garage name and not “Joe’s Garage”
B) It’s just not that funny

 

[NorCalBlue]

Donald Trump.

That joke isn't funny anymore...