Joke thread

[Indaparkside]

Van Gogh goes in a pub-his mate said you want a beer nar he replies I’ve got one ear

 

[Indaparkside]

A policeman stopped a motorist driving in the centre of town one evening, would you mind blowing into this bag sir, why said the motorist because my chips are too hot replied the copper

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

 

[Ancient Citizen]

Just seen 2 lepors playing cards one lost so he threw his hand in

The other one laughed his head off.

Edit: Someone beat me to it!

 

[balotellishaircut]

I was interviewed by the Police last night.

I answered every question with a “No Comment.“

They rang this morning, I didn’t get the job.

 

[balotellishaircut]

I’ve been recommended the Adam Ant diet.
Don’t chew ever, don’t chew ever...

 

[RadcliffeRick]

 

[Tuearts right boot]

View attachment 11049

I've told the wife a hundred times....wear a bloody scarf woman, it's cold out.

 

[Deleted member 77198]

Brilliant!

 

[1.618034]

* NORTHERN RAIL WARNING *

Please note that all Northern Rail passenger services between Lime Street and Walton will be suspended every Saturday and Sunday until further notice.

This is due to a massive points failure at Anfield.