Joke thread

A chicken farmer goes into a bar to celebrate & asks the barman for a glass of champaign,
A young lady sat at the bar also drinking champaign says to the farmer thats a Coincidence I am celebrating as well, me and my husband have been trying to have a child for years & my doctor has just told me I am pregnant, she then asks the farmer what are you celebrating?
Well he says thats another Coincidence, for ages my hens have not been able to have any chicks & now the eggs have just started hatching, so the young lady asks the farmer, I cant believe all these Coincidences, why do you think your hens can now have chicks?
So the farmer says, well I tried using a different Cock...................
 
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There was a preacher who fell in the ocean and he couldn't swim. When a boat came by, the captain yelled, "Do you need help, sir?" The preacher calmly said "No, God will save me." A little later, another boat came by and a fisherman asked, "Hey, do you need help?" The preacher replied again, "No God will save me." Eventually the preacher drowned & went to heaven. The preacher asked God, "Why didn't you save me?"
God replied, "Fool, I sent you two boats!"
 

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