Joke thread

what page are the funny jokes on?.....just read about fuckin 6 pages of shite not even cracked a smile yet. I'll leave one here while i'm here, a van gogh, bloke walks into the doctors with a frog hanging out of his ear.....doctor says "oh my god how long have you been suffering with that?".....the frog says "about a week it started as boil on me arse"
 
colin's bell helmet said:
what page are the funny jokes on?.....just read about fuckin 6 pages of shite not even cracked a smile yet. I'll leave one here while i'm here, a van gogh, bloke walks into the doctors with a frog hanging out of his ear.....doctor says "oh my god how long have you been suffering with that?".....the frog says "about a week it started as boil on me arse"
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There is the odd good one but unfortunately there is a very proficient 'look at me, everyone!' tosser with no filter who has to share everything he sees on some other joke site. About 1 in 20 is good but I think the guy has some sort of personality defect and craves attention. It would be fine if he applied a filter and just shared the odd good one but he completely floods the page and has ruined it. I used to love reading the joke thread.
 
Stuuuuuu said:
There is the odd good one but unfortunately there is a very proficient 'look at me, everyone!' tosser with no filter who has to share everything he sees on some other joke site. About 1 in 20 is good but I think the guy has some sort of personality defect and craves attention. It would be fine if he applied a filter and just shared the odd good one but he completely floods the page and has ruined it. I used to love reading the joke thread.
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Harsh....but fair.
 
Stuuuuuu said:
There is the odd good one but unfortunately there is a very proficient 'look at me, everyone!' tosser with no filter who has to share everything he sees on some other joke site. About 1 in 20 is good but I think the guy has some sort of personality defect and craves attention. It would be fine if he applied a filter and just shared the odd good one but he completely floods the page and has ruined it. I used to love reading the joke thread.
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You could just put him on ignore
 
When my gf treated herself to a vibrator she said it was just a naughty bit of fun. I bought myself a 240 volt fuckmaster pro 5000 latex doll with 6 speed pulsating pussy, elasticated anus with built in non drip semen collecting tray, together with the optional built in realstic orgasm scream in 7.1 surround sound system and I’m a pervert.
 
Stuuuuuu said:
There is the odd good one but unfortunately there is a very proficient 'look at me, everyone!' tosser with no filter who has to share everything he sees on some other joke site. About 1 in 20 is good but I think the guy has some sort of personality defect and craves attention. It would be fine if he applied a filter and just shared the odd good one but he completely floods the page and has ruined it. I used to love reading the joke thread.
Click to expand...
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An Englishman and a Dutchman are sitting in a pub. The Dutchman says to the Englishman, “Every time I see you in here you walk out with a different girl. What’s your secret?”

The Englishman replies, “It’s really easy. As soon as I walk into the pub, I casually toss my Rolls Royce keys onto the bar, and the gals practically throw themselves at me.”

The Dutchman says “Wow, you’ve got a Rolls Royce?”

The Englishman replies, “No, I’m just as poor as you. I bought this Rolls Royce key fob on Amazon for £10, and the ladies are none the wiser.”

So the Dutchman goes on Amazon and buys the exact same key fob. He then goes to various pubs across London, with no luck whatsoever. A few weeks later, he runs into the Englishman again. He tells the Englishman “Your key fob trick is bogus, I went to at least 20 pubs, no lady looked at me twice, please take this bad luck charm off my hands.”

The Englishman tells him, “Maybe it would work better if you took off your bicycle helmet first.”
 
A man walked into a bar, sat down, and ordered a beer. As he sipped the beer, he heard a soothing voice say “nice tie!” Looking around, he noticed that the bar was empty except for himself and the bartender at the end of the bar. A few sips later, the voice said “beautiful shirt“. At this, the man called the bartender over. “Hey…I must be losing my mind,” he told the bartender. “I keep hearing these voices saying nice things, and there’s not a soul in here but us.” “It’s the peanuts,” answered the bartender. “Say what?” “You heard me,” said the barkeeper. “It’s the peanuts … they’re complimentary.“
 
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