wodda said:
Bertie and his mates, giddy about their trip to Wembley.....joyfully skip to Stockport station.....
"we're not really here"........"que sera sera"......."take that banner down"......"blue moon"
They've got their Man City lunchboxes, some top trumps, Bass shandy and rum and rasin ice cream for the journey (LADS).
The train pulls in and they skip onto the nearest carriage......but wait, whats going on???
The train is full of moody lads in black jackets, drinking, smoking and gambling on the tables........
Whats happened? Are they all going down for the London Marathon?? Whats that....why are they goading us?......are they United fans? Why have they travelled to Manchester to go back down the London?! THIS ISNT HOW IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN!!.
Bertie and his mates walk down the carriage.....and find their advanced booked seats.....unsure whats going on....must be a mix up......there's 4 lads sat in the seats......."excuse me sir, your in my seat"......"fuck off you sad twat"......."oh i'm sorry must have been a mix up"........."no mix up now hand over that nice MCFC lunch box and lets see what your mum's made me".
Bertie and the boys...retreat down the carriage and resign to the fact they will have to sit on the floor.......
2 1/2 hours of "35 years"......drunken yobs walking over them to go for a piss every mintute, with the sly boot left in every now and again......realising they are being used as human ashtrays.........this isnt how it should be.....this isnt their image of a joyous trip to London.......
Bertie looks at his sad reflection in the window.....he noticed 2 tear marks have smudged his facepaint.......as a MUFC yob opens a bashed can of stella, spraying beer all over his "Wembly 2011" t shirt.......
Well all I can say to that Poet Laureate is
"After listening to you, I've decided I am in favor of abortion in cases of incest."
"I'd insult you, but you're not bright enough to notice."
"I'm trying to imagine you with a personality."
"If I throw a stick, will you leave?"
"Diarrhea of the mouth; constipation of the ideas."
"A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it."
"Too many freaks, not enough circuses."
"Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?"
"Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed."
"May your children be so famous every policeman knows them."
"Any friend of yours ... is a friend of yours"
"Brains aren't everything. In fact, in your case they're nothing!"
That's enough of my time wasted on you so" FUCK OFF YOU RED TWAT"